Can't Stop This Thing We've Started

Wahhhhttt A stART!!!

2010-02-12T23:56:00.008+08:00

Hey guys, glad to see all of you here.

banana-with the cute carrot is back!!

It's been 2 months into year 2010, really did miss you guys. For some of us, life goes on the same, but for most of us, it's a different game all together. College and Uni life is like beer versus wine, or black versus white, at least that applies to me. I can't help but to feel lost in transition these days.

To start off with, the people back in Foundation were the warmest, friendliest, the most receptive of changes and ideas. However, Uni is the total opposite. People are like thick castle walls that are almost impossible to penetrate. Even if the invitation into the castle were done through the most basic avenue- empty talk. Empirical evidence reports that people are just not comfortable stepping out of their own comfort zone. Some of them are just too proud to talk to you... >.<

But wait, it will be so unfair for me to make preconceived judgements, not like this. I guess it's because of the expectation that I brought into Uni that made it sour to go through the first few weeks. Maybe it's because of the diverse characters found within the class population, that makes it hard for certain people to be able warm up to you. Or maybe it's because everyone's new, and all we need is just time.

Call it crazy, but I think this equation make sense:

EQN to solve unfriendliness =

[time x (gradual small talks)] + open mindedness

______________________________________

situational Adaptation

It's been 2 months already. I've warmed up most parts of the class, except for a few individuals. I guess the only factor that can interfere with the above equation's intended results will be the other person's willingness to tag with you. So if you ever feel something's not right with you conversation partner's non-verbal cues, back out!! Then engage the person again with a different topic. Well.....like if your friend frowns when you ask a question or try to engage him/her in a convo, you know something's not right. If your friend decides to talk to another person beside her apart from you, you know something's wrong. and if your friend keeps talking to the other friend, and leave you hanging, you know what to do.

What do you think guys? I don't know man...but i think that people are harder to please, and because of that, they prefer to stick to their own gang. People these days seems to be wearing a mask. You can tell that they're being cautious not to do silly things. Afraid to be judged?

What could be worst? Your best friend who seems to be your closest buddy in college just laughed at your jokes, make a lasting conversation with you like you guys did in college just didn't bother you. Ouch dude!! The worst thing is that he realizes that you're being left out. Well, not completely, but enough to not be inside his new circle of new found friends. And he does nothing. Not even an effort to pull both sides together. Not even a try when you approach him regarding the matter of new friends not willing to accept you. The worst part? He prefers to talk to new friends instead of you. Well, I dun blame him, we all find new toys interesting while the old one less interesting, but it kind of makes you wonder what went wrong..? Does it not?

Hey, Hey...what I say here might just be messy to you, and it is messy. Simple because you have a messy writter with a messed up emotion...But hey, bad start does not mean it will end badly. I just got a feeling that this will change.

Let me see you speak guys ^^

DJ Signing out,

-DJ Damian

I know it's kind of early But Happy Birthday

2010-01-19T22:56:00.003+08:00

To: Cute Carrot Chris

Feel surprise that I know tomorrow,20th Jan is your birthday?
Its written in facebook.
Thats how I found out,ahahahah!

Anyway, a birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.
So, enjoy the trip.

I wish you have a great 19th birthday!
&
I'll buy you a cake if I see you since you bought a cake for me during my birthday.

Once again, Happy Birthday!

Mind like a lens

2010-01-15T10:29:00.006+08:00

Not only that, of course it comes with good memories that I had last year. I really appreciate whatever that happened in the 2009 because it really meant a lot for me and made me to be a better person.

Anyway, I'm writing this post since our dear Poly claimed that Banana-with-The Cute Carrot is dead for so long. We have abandoned this blog for goddamnlong! So here I am to do something that I promised to Poly earlier on which is contribute a new post in this blog.

Have you guys noticed that this blog is always written by Poly and I only? Where is the other two guys? I guess they are missing in action especially Cute Carrot Chris!

Poly, I really wish I could write something here but I cant think of anything. So I'll do a proper post soon, promise.

Anyway, I would like to wish everyone have a Happy 2010 which I hope it is not to late to say so.

Welcome

2010-01-05T11:53:00.005+08:00

Never notice how fast time had passed untill I heard the sound of fireworks blooming around in the city. The echoes of blooming and yelling of everyone in the sense of excitement had warmly welcomed the brand new year 2010. Watching the sparks and smoke of the fireworks appearing on the sky gave warmth and happiness to everyone who are watching it or even listening it.

Fireworks display is often an guaranteed sight during new year count down. Everyone could share the excitement, the joy felt of new year and spread it to people around. Sharing the affection we had will unexpectedly make us happier as "sahring is so call, caring".

For me the end of 2009 was nothing special, funky, or full of noise. This year, I choose not to join a countdown party and squeeze along with people sweating uncontrollably or even with people yelling excitedly with high pitch. The first second of 2010 for me is no longer with the sight of fantastic fireworks display and with spray floating in the air or on my head. This year, for me i had welcomed the 2010 with the echo of the fireworks hitting in my eardrum and the sound of handphone beeping as many in coming wishes are being delivered to me just on time.

I never expect for a grand celebration or big surprise given, but a simple dinner filled with laughter on the dining table with my family will be the most precious celebration ever for me to welcome the brand new year. And for my new year resolution, frankly speaking I didn't really think about it. Perhaps try my best to get things done and put in my best effort to achieve things I wanted for will get me everything i hope for. Except for those which are not controlled by us human being, such as fate. Time to meet someone right at a right place and the right time, moment to bump into someone at an intersection will never able to be controlled by us.

So well, here I wish everyone Happy New Year 2010. Enjoy every moment in this year and cherish every second and people around you. Notice every happenings and never miss any wonderful things occured. Strive for what you have been craving for and never allow yourself to regret on everything you had done. Have a great year my friends ^^ escpecially our *CDVP* Hurray !!!

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

The beginning of an ending

2009-09-01T10:38:00.003+08:00

Since the blog is dead, I'll just post up some crap to keep it alive

College is starting tomorrow and good luck for everyone

especially members of banana-with-thecutecarrot

for our final semester except for Chris since he is done with foundation,ahaha

Happy Ending

2009-08-08T22:20:00.004+08:00

3 and a half motnh came to an end .
6/8/2009 It's the last class of our human communication
Had a class party and many food were prepared ^^

Btw this is the one and only class picture of our "big family"

Like this photo a lot ...

And hoping evryone all the best in the future
Although all of us might not be in the same class anymore

Good luck and study hard in finals yea ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

A Happy Happy Birthday

2009-08-02T01:05:00.000+08:00

Hmm..the advent of your birthday is finally here. This just shows how fast time flies. Plus, it has been ages since i last posted. Well I'll just keep things short and simple. May all your dreams be at their sweetest and your every wishes come true. Fun times ahead. With this in mind, I hope that this greeting will make your day all the more important and worthwhile. I wish you the best and you deserve to feel special in every way for this moment. Happy Birthday, Vanilla Villain.

Hugs and kisses from cdvp..

Cute Carrot Chris

Happy Birthday !!!

2009-08-01T14:06:00.004+08:00

TO : Vivian

Happy Sweet *18*th Birthday my friend ^^

Stay happy, healthy and Enjoy your day

Hope you will get all the best things in life ",

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Hapily Ever After

2009-07-15T11:47:00.004+08:00

Time flies, one more month to complete this semester. This is probably going to be my last post in this blog since the due date of this assignment is this week.

So I guess everyone must wonder how we came out with " banana-with-thecutecarrot" to represent our group and it was actually a funny topic for everyone in the class. Well, I will just say... it is a random idea. We never thought of this before. We came out with different names, some are serious and some are lame. However, those names are not available when we were applying a new domain for our human communication blog. Since I was the one who in charge of organizing this blog, I just put banana to match with our original idea which is the cute carrot. Why banana? It was just a random idea, no explaination. I was just thinking about monkey at that moment and eventually the idea of banana popped out of nowhere. We want something funny and lame so that people will remember our blog name. Come on, banana-with-thecutecarrot? Have you ever heard of it before? I'm pretty sure this blog is the first one to present this idea. Besides, you can see our group picture as our blogskin. Why group picture? We want something special than other. Instead of using the blogskins that are provided, we decided to make our own blogskin with our group picture. This how we came out with banana-with-thecutecarrot.

I must say banan-with-thecutecarrot is an amazing team. All of us are really into our human communication stuff like tutorial game, 5 minutes silent video clip and movie assignment. It is the fate that brought four of us to be in the same group. We, from hi-and-bye friends to now, friends that can click with each other, help each other and be there to support each other.

What have I chosen human communication? I still remember this question. Now, I can tell you why human communication. Basically, I just want to be a better communicator for my future like how to deal with people. Fashion buyer is always my dream job, a future job that I really want. As the word buyer, I must know how to communicate with others when I want to purchase their products for the company. However, after the pass 2 months plus, I have gained more than what I want. Now, I do not expect people think alike with me and do something that I expect. Trust me, I always though my friends understand what I mean through hints or expect them understand my body action. I understand how people communicate and how to avoid to have conflict. The tone, the meaning of the word, the body action and so on are very important when it comes to communication.

Lastly, I would like to thank to the lecturer, Mr.Murali that make the class to be a fun class and banana-with-thecutecarrot! Human communication class is a memorable class!

Closer

2009-07-12T20:34:00.004+08:00

Have you guys noticed that blogging actually bring all of us to be closer? The other way for us to communicate with others? Sharing is the main purpose to have a blog. We write down our opinion or story in blog to share with people that think like us. Eventually it brought all of us to have a closer relationship.

I started to blog since I was 15 while blogging was still a new thing for everyone at that moment. The main reason for me to have a blog is because I was looking for a place to write something down so that I can remember my past. I know some people will ask "Isn't it better to have a dairy?". However, we can put pictures, musics and video in blog and those cannot be done in dairy. After high school, I cannot always meet up with my high schoolmates no matter how close we are unless we study the same college with them. Unfortunately, my close friends are studying at other colleges. With different timetable for assignments, quizzes and exam, we hardly get the chance to meet up until recently we all met up at MOS for Mad to Max event. So, blogging is the only way to share our story and keep tracks with others about what is going on in our life.

Sometimes, I randomly visit others' blog and you will find out your A friend knows your B friend as well. How small can the world be? Looking through all the pictures in everyone's blog, you will realize that everyone knows everyone. The social circle is not that big.

Some people or I should say professional blogger like cheeserland or fourfeetnine share their personal life in blog and people actually read it. They became celebrity blogger which we never heard of it back in few years. We can even get useful information from blog like food information, IT, fashion and so on. Whatever things that can be done through website also can be done in blog.

Why do we read others' blog? One purpose, to have a closer relationship with everyone.

Feel like a Star

2009-07-12T20:29:00.001+08:00

I'm sure most of the people are afraid of standing on stage whether to perform or to give a speech. I feel that way too. 12th July 2008,which is last year, my club held an event which was International Understanding Day. So my friends and I took part in dance performance.

From the day we decided to take part to perform, we had madness dance practice that drove everyone crazy especially it clashed our school exam. Besides, we also had arguments due to different opinions, timing to practice or being lazy to practice in the studio.

On that day itself, we were so nervous at the backstage because we never performed in front of public other than people in the studio. We did a lot of weird stuff like jumping around to calm us down before the performance. Well, stage fright. Luckily, we managed to perform without showing our nervous emotion in front of the audiences at the end.

See, everyone is fear of stage but we just need to find a way to calm ourselves down before we perform. Imagine people that always on stage like Obama. He is not born to be a good public speaker, gives speeches in front of thousand of people or even more than that. Is just that, he found his way to overcome his fear. Look at popular singer, some of them used to be shy and afraid to perform in front of people but now, they can perform at anytime, anywhere.

Stage is not that scary as long as we find our way to overcome it. As for me, I will always think of people that I love before I perform in front of public because I know they will always be there to support me although they are not physically with me.

Clothes Maketh A Man

2009-07-11T01:18:00.000+08:00

What do you think about this man way of dressing. Does he look attractive? Funny? Interesting? Funky? Punk or Cool? But seriously if this guy appear like that in public, he really has successfully catch the public attention. I believe that you and I will definitely lay our vision on him with you eyeball puffing out. And the expression is definitely shocked and you might say :"OMG. Why is he dressing like that. Is he INSANE ?!"

Clothing is an important element. It gives people the first impression of you and it can also be a symbol of your personality. It's a relatively straight forward method of impression management and it's a means of nonverbal communication. Clothing also able to enhance one's physical attractiveness. Someone says that "There are no definite ugly person in this world, but there are only lazy people". This saying clearly explains that everyone can be attractive to others no matter how they look like. Just spend some time, put in effort to dress up and choose the appropriate attire, then you will be able to see the obvious changes on your ownself.

People also used to make assumption on a person based on their clothing. A businessman can show their economic status by wearing a smart coat; A doctor can show their professional image by wearing a white coat; An air steward can wear uniform to show their occupation; and lastly even a beggar also can dress in rags to clearly show others their poor condition and the low status in this society.

However, now a days the in crowd like to dress according to the latest trend. They are willing to spend a large amount of money to buy the latest designer clothes and dress fashionably to show off. They are also people that are very brand conscious. They will only choose to buy all the branded clothing. My viewpoint is that, no matter how expensive clothes you are wearing or how trendy the clothes you are wearing, it's also not the key idea to dress well. A person can easily being praised by others if they are able to put themself in a suitable and comfortable clothing.

Dressing up its like fitting you own body into a comfortable house. It doesn't matter how expensive the house is but the most important thing is you must ensure that you are comfortable to stay in your own house. And when you choose your clothing, don't be shame to choose the one that can fit you well. Don't hesitate to buy a XXL pants if XL doesn't fit you; Don't afraid to buy a XL T-shirt if L doesn't suit you. This principle also work in the same way in buying a house. If you doesn't earn much then you shall just buy a lot in the apartment. If u can afford then you shall buy a lot of banglo. Don't ever try to fit yourself in a "apartment" room if your butt only fits well in a "bungalow" size pants.

They are still a lot more knowledge about how to dress well are awaiting us to explore. But bare in mind that you will definitely look perfect whenever you dress well and put yourself under a comfort manner. Choose your attire smartly and dress Smart. It's a form of of respect to others, as "clothes maketh a man".

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Staying in Touch

2009-07-05T15:40:00.009+08:00

The relationship between mother and daughter can counted as one of the most general warmth and closeness in this world. Of course, sometimes they fight for little small things but most resolve themselves with heartfelt apologies from both sides, and lots of hugs.

However, during adolescence daughter is faced with the task of differentiating herself, the mother-daughter relationship becomes one of alternating intimacy and hate, both marked with an intensity that only teenagers can bring to a relationship and bring out of their parents. For example, me, myself and my mother. Nowadays, The relationship between my mom and I are more to best friends. I always tell her like " The guy is hot" when I see any hot guys or some random talks. Instead of going to mall together, we always go out for brunch or lunch when my siblings are having school. I enjoy eating food and I always persuade her to bring me out for food after I read food article from newspaper or blog. And now, I want to learn how to cook chinese food from her. It will be so fun, cooking lessons in the kitchen!

I remember once when I was in LRT with her, I cried in front of her and telling her that I could not deal with the mistake that I have made. Of course, she got freak out because I was crying in front of the public. What she did was just try to calm me down by telling me "everything is gonna be fine and she will help me and so on". At that moment, I felt so guilty for what I did, being so stubborn without accepting others' opinion at the beginning and created a mess for everyone.

It is true to say that mom and daugther have a lot of fight especially growing stage because the daugther's self-esteem is increasing and deal with a lot of things like friendship, boys and studies. However, it is hard for mom to sit and watch their daughter suffer with it and eventually they will take action to interupt their daughter's problems. I have that problems as well, even until now. Sometimes, I will get annoyed with repeated questions from her again and agian then I will start to raise my voice lound to answer her which is very rude. Sorry, mom. The fact that she does that is because she cares about me and I am always the small little girl for her. I am pretty sure thing will still remain the same eventhough I reach to age 40 and have my own children.

As we can see, mother is the one who always physically and mentally be there for us. No matter what we do or what we say, she will still be there and look after us without complaining. Start from now on, we must treat our mom nicely since they deserve it. My little advise, treat your mom nicely because you seriosuly do not want to end up living in a regretful life because you did not treating her nice.

DJ on Social:~Looking at The Bigger Picture

2009-07-05T11:00:00.001+08:00

DJ on T-E-A-M

2009-07-05T10:59:00.000+08:00

The groups

2009-07-04T23:58:00.003+08:00

Take a look in these few pictures below:

The popular girls

The popular guys

These two pictures shown us that social grouping is one of the nature things in this world. As we all know, we always categorized people into group like the popular one, the nerdy one, the weird one and so on. We tend to put them into a particular group through what we see or what we hear and people that we labeled them under that group hardly get the chance to prove us whether they deserve the label or not.

Our physical look and ability on working or studying are things that determine which group are we under. It is true to say that judging others by physical look is very unfair but it is the fact of social circle. We have seen people label them as the "beauty group" and others label people that have unattractive as the "ugly group".

In order to fit into the group, most of us tend to lose our own personality. We follow what others do, no matter the actions are right or wrong. We will change ourselves to fit in from the way we dress, speak and act. Some of us are even willing hurt innocent people just to fit into the group that they want to be into. In other word, fitting into the group is something that we want, we do not want to be the loner or the left out.

This scene can be seen at everywhere like kindergarten, schools, colleges, workplaces or social clubs. It never stopped. By dividing people into groups will cause a lot of social problems as well. We often see this group dislike the other group or this group anti-that group. Once, I was in this camp with some other teenagers and I was told by them that I must indirectly pick which side am I and who is the one I support. Yes, you guys probably say that " Can i not to choose any side?" but at the end of the day, we still have to pick one side to fit into the group. Like I say, social grouping never comes in a easy way.

Self-fulfilling

2009-07-04T01:04:00.001+08:00

This is a picture of a korean actor "Jang Ja Yun" who starred in a korean drama that has been very hit recently, named "Boys Over Flowers". She had passed away recently in March. Upon investigation, it had been proven that she had experienced serious depression since 10 years ago and that had led to her death. She hung herself from a railing along her stairs and she had passed away when the police arrived.

A lot of artist have been lately revealed that they are surferring from clinical depression. This is because most of them are unable to overcome the stress and working load. They felt uneasy to live under the observation of the public as they are often followed by paparazzi. As a pulic person, some part of their private life and some small action of them will also be enlarged and criticised by others.

Statistic shown that 15% of those who are clinically depressed died of suicide. Majority of people who choose to suicide is around the age of 20 to 24. And the gender ratio in this age group is 7:1 (Males : Females). Mentally disorder, Stress, Neglect, Physically ill, Poor Health, Depressed, Poverty, abuse are the few reasons which can cause suicide. However in my viewpoint, I think the thought of one is the key idea which can really lead to suicide.

"The expectation of one person govern another's action" and "one's expectations influence their own behavior". A normal person will have a healthy brain chemistry. If they are able to hold strong self-concept, they won't be easily affected by others unnecessary criticism and comments. And if they have self-fulfilling prophecy, they ar able to make things happened like what they expected. Exaggerating their actions and add in a little effort or hard work can easily bring about expected event. By that time, a person's expectation most probably will make the outcome to occur and been true.

Therefore with self-fulfilling prophecy, people with suicidal thoughts are not necessary to end up dying. They should always bare in mind that they can do it and they have the ability to overcome the depression and must not let the suicidal thoughts to conquer them and push them to death. People around them should also motivate them and company them, make them feel that they are important. Share things with them and try to bring them out to mix around with people. It can help to ease their depression.

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Holding Hands

2009-07-02T23:56:00.001+08:00

During our day of birth, our parents held our hands and brought us to this amazing world ...
At that moment, the only respond we gave is crying ... Our parents cradle us in their arms and I knew it's an absolutely mind blowing awesome moment for them ...

During the age of 1, we started to crawl on the floor and we hardly stay still in their arms ... We wanted to struggle and crawl away from them as we wanted to experience the freedom to crawl on the floor ... But our parents still can catch us with their palm and gently carry us on their arms again ... I can still barely remember the heat from my parents, when i were in their arms

During the age of 5, our parents held our hands and taught us how to walk ... Although we fell and slipped but they will still lend us their hand and patiently teach us again ... They also taught us how to buckel our own shoes, tie our shoe lace, button our shirt, comb our hair and etc ...

During the age of 7, our parents held our hands and lead us into our school ... We grabbed their hand tightly as we are afraid of the new environment and the strangers around us ... We felt so insecure and lean closely to our parents body ...

During the age of 15, we had our own friends and we often blame our parents for being too grumpy, tradition and even too strict ... We wanted to fight for our own freedom ... So, We hated their existence ... We used harsh and sarcastic word to reject their good advice to us ... We rejected their help and we never listen to their advice anymore ...

During the age of 18, we thought we are grown up and are able to live and survive on our own ...
And some of us, might try to run away from house, run away from this grumpy couple, and run away from all the restrictions ... We never understand their intention and we never try to put ourselves in their own shoe ...

As we grown older 20 ... 21 ... 25 ... 30 ... 35 .... 40 .... 45 .... 55
We will soon have our own family and we started to be very busy on our own life ...

By that time, our parents had grown older too ... One day, when we return home to visit our parents .... WE brought our kids and family together ... By that time, you will only noticed that your parents are old already ... Their hair are white, their face are full of wrinkles ... And they could hardly stand up and give you a hug in their arms to welcome you ... Now, they can only lend you their shivery hands and give you a handshake to welcome you ...And now you should know that it's your turn to take care of them .

Don't blame them if they cant hold the comb properly and comb their own hair; Button their shirt if they left out one; Buckle their shoe if they cant bend down and do it; Hold their hand tightly and lead them to cross the road ... Give them your hand and hold them tightly during their old age ... They will feel more secure knowing that you will always be there for them when they can no longer do things on their own ... And finally hold their hands tightly too like how they held us to this world during our birth day .... Never let go yoru hands when they release their last breathe ... Stay beside them and give them warmth through your palms when they ended their journey on this earth ...

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Rest In Peace

2009-06-28T22:12:00.003+08:00

Life is really unpredictable. For example, death comes in shock.

Last Friday was a very sad day for most of the people especially Micheal Jackson's fans. Once my mom came back from sending my siblings to school, she told me that Micheal Jackson passed away in the morning. Honestly, receiving news about people passing away is not the first thing that I want to hear early in the morning.

He is the only King of Pop in everyone's heart, a legend singer. He created a lot of trends in the past like amazing music videos and dances. These things are still in our heart even singers also learn from him. A lot of pop star singers treated him as an idol and want to be like him. MJ motivated them indirectly. Not only singers, teenagers also want to dance like him especially Moon Walk dance.

The first MJ's song that I listened to is " Thriller " with the amazing music video that have a strong incredible impact on everyone. I used to get freak out whenever I watched the music video because he looked very scary but I was totally in love in the dance move that shown in " Thriller ". It was like a dance move that everyone must know, at least it was for me and my friends. We always made this move whenever we were jobless. Trust me, dance with school uniform in the class is really fun especially Thriller dance move that everyone knows.

And now, he is gone as in forever. For the past one week, I have watched or listened a lot of MJ's music video.His songs is never ever gotten boring or old, no matter how many times we listen Seriously, it is very sad and a big lost for us since he passed away. Seriously, it is a big lost for us since he is no longer here anymore.

We'll miss you, Micheal Jackson.

Closing The Ring:~You're never free from the promises that you make

2009-06-28T22:11:00.003+08:00

“I promise you”….We are all very familiar with the long used phrase. This is a phrase that is used for centuries by many cultures with the intention of committing a number of people to a similar covenant. It’s very sole purpose is to remind the people in the same circle of the agreement made to each other. It could come in a form of pinky swear, or even in a form of a serious Holy Matrimony.

Last week, I manage to catch a movie goes by the name of “Closing the Ring”, which talks about a promise between two young couples during war time. A promise that says the both of them will always be a couple as one, and that they will always be one forever. However, the complications begin when the male companion fails to return home. On the receiving end, the female companion refuses to accept the fact that he is long gone, and still believes that he is still alive, and wait patiently for the day where he arrives to come.

You see, promise paints a very beautiful picture if it is fulfilled. Like how the Spanish like to put it, it takes two to tango. It requires effort and trust to pain this picture. When you make a promise, you don’t only sell your words, but your trust and dignity, a part of yourselves. On both receiving ends, you strive in everyway to defend your believe and at the same time, hoping that the other party doesn’t give up so easily, especially when it comes to a promise that is hard to keep.

As depicted above, a promise drives an individual to be very loyal to his or her own corresponding member. It drives them to push all the obstacles aside and remain focus of their main goal. Some call it naïf, but to the people who make the promise it’s a symbol of what appears to be more than friendship. Take a lecturer for an example; once he or she is tied to an oath, that is to teach and do a job well done, he or she has to make it come true at the end of the day. In a way, it raises the standards of the intended action and at the same time, reminding themselves that there is something more that that.

“You are never free of the promises that you make” that was the tagline of the whole movie. This phrase is very well said as a promise between two or more people is actually a very serious issue to address. The sad thing is, many contemporary citizens fail to understand its magnitude. As long as a promise is made, it can never be undone. It’s just like telling your wife that you accept her on day of marriage, and tell her that you have no feelings for her the next day. How would it make any logical sense?

A very clear example would be like Politicians making promises to their people. This in turn, provides a clear insight of how reliable this person is when it comes to manifesting his own words. While he is exposed on the outside making promises, you on the receiving end can observe and scrutinize him. We always rely on people who can live their very own words. It seems that promises makes the benchmark to whether a person is reliable or not. “See! He did what he promises. He’s a reliable man.” Sounds like a clichés to you, doesn’t it?

I think that when a promise is made, the content does not matter at all. However, what matters most is how sincere you are in committing that promise. You can make the world’s biggest promise and fail to live it through, not because it’s the world’s biggest promise, but simply because you never mean it in the first place.

Promise is a driving force that keeps that small flame of interest burning. It keeps us going when the going gets harder. We as individuals make promises in some ways or another. But the question that we have to ask ourselves is, “am I ready to take up that challenge to live through my words?”. In the movie “The Transporter 2”, the leading actor named Frank has a rule of his own when it comes to promise, which is “Never keep a promise that you can’t keep”. If you can’t keep a decent promise, you might as well just don’t make it in the first place.

So the question is, “Can you keep a promise?”

DJ online,
Damian Thomas Khaw

DJ on Kelvin Client:~The Shirt

2009-06-28T22:09:00.001+08:00

How does Kelvin Client Shirt collection comes into play in our lives?

Now when we pass through a shop, the very first thing that catches our attention would drive us to pay a visit that particular shop. Now in this shop, you found out that this particular shirt caught your attention. And so, you develop an interest in it. What do you do next? You take it down and have a feel of it, of course. After knowing that the material is satisfactory, you then make your way to the dressing room to try it out. The main purpose in trying out is to see whether the shirt fits and looks nice on you.

Now here comes the tough decision. Do I buy it, or not? If I do, I have to be certain that I wouldn’t regret buying it. If the answer is a very certain yes, you then make your way to the cash register to get your shirt paid. What happens after that? You enjoy the shirt that gives you style, warmth, and comfort for the rest of your days.

Now that’s how a relationship takes place.

Take visiting a shop as entering an arena to meet people. And take that particular shirt that attracts your attention as a someone that stands our in your world. So, what do we do next? We take the shirt up and take a look at it on the surface. So, we make small talks with that person to find out general things about that person. This is what we call the experimenting stage.
After touching and having the feel of the material, we then make our way to the changing room. This is when we start to intensify the relationship. And so we start looking for this person’s strengths and weaknesses, getting to know this person on a deeper level.

What happens after that? Well, if we’re certain that this is the perfect shirt, we make our purchase. The same thing applies in a relationship. If you are certain that this is the person that you’d like to be with, you start integrating. This is a stage when people see you as a unit, having the same interest, identity like nick names for each other and many more.

The post purchase is when we walk out the shop with our satisfied goods. This is also the stage where the two individuals bond and walk out of the arena to enjoy a life long experience of sharing their lives together.

However, the problem arises when people neglect the importance of the evaluation stage, which is the stage when you are in the changing room. You see, many people, in particular the youth today failed to observe the importance of that stage. So what they do is that they take this stage very lightly and start off a relationship without knowing whether it will work or not. Some even go up till the purchasing stage and say “it’s over, let’s break off”. Sadly, among the many shirts that comes of the reality Kelvin Client, only a handful are lucky enough to not make it back to the shop.

So you will start to wonder, what’s wrong with returning the goods? To tell the truth, there’s nothing wrong in returning the goods. However, the system isn’t supposed to work that way. The idea of the shirt system is that you only buy the shirt when you truly want the shirt, not because it looks nice on you NOW.

What happends when you return the shirt?

When you return a shirt, the shirt has been worn, stretched, or torn in one way or another. It faces one thing, rejection. And this sense of rejection, according to many puppy love victims are said to be the deepest rejection. They can marry 3 different partners, having a time of their lives but are still carry the guilt and pain from their first relationship.

We hear people saying “it’s ok to try out different partners” but the truth is twisted. What it really meant was, get to know different people first before starting a serious relationship. And if you ever star a serious relationship, make sure you are certain and determined that this relationship is really what you want.

Sheryl Crow sang this song in 2006. “The First Cut is the Deepest” was a hit at all radio stations in 2006. True enough many victims of puppy love find themselves carrying a scar in their heart from the first person they got together with. And the fact that it was a puppy love makes that the relationship never took place. And what they had was just nothing significant, it was rather something that does not reflect the true meaning of what a relationship is all about.

A personal experience of mine from my first relationship, which dates back into high school still haunt me from time to time. And the feel of rejection certainly didn’t feel any better.And the common question is always “Why? Have I done anything wrong?”

Whether have I done anything wrong still remains a mystery to me, but the one thing that I know where I’ve gone wrong is that I jumped the gun too soon. In other words, means I fail to observe the evaluation part. I fail to observe this girl long enough to know and truly understand her in and out to know that she will dump me for another person. I wouldn't consider that as a fatal mistake not a deep cut. Instead, I would say that it made me wiser in my choices. I guess this taught me a very clear lesson on the next ship that I’m on.

And the key to a good evaluation? It’s none other the less than patience and time.

The moral of the story from Kelvin Client is:

Think before you Buy

DJ online,
Damian Thomas Khaw

Breaking Free

2009-06-27T16:51:00.005+08:00

Time flies, it is the end of June now. Without realizing, I have spent 6 months in Help University College. Come to think of it, what did I do for the past 6 months? Honestly, I have no idea other than normal routine like attending college, rush for assignments, revision studies and hang out with my friends. That's it! That's what I have been doing for the past 6 months.

As you can see, we put a lot of energy and effort into living especially trying to fit into social circle. So on a regular basic, we should take our time to step out from where we are and look around. Fully experience our life and the world in which we live.

Spend some time on something that is unusual for us other than to take in all the richness of which we're a part. Take some time to allow our thoughts to be still. Feel the wonder, the goodness, the beauty of simply being, and knowing that we are.

Instead of experience life to gain any advantage or to impress someone, we should experience life for ourselves because the depth of its richness has no limit.

The more we experience and appreciate life, the more we'll find ourselves needing less and having more. Experience life, and we'll clearly see how truly rich we already are.

Life is a gift so precious that it has no equal. Experience life, and give that gift to yourself and others. You really do not spend your life without understand the amazing real world!

Chronemics

2009-06-25T16:53:00.000+08:00

The study of how human being use and structure time. Time is not a solid object and it definitely not a soluble liquid. We cant see the real structure and properties of time but we can experience and feel how time flies and passes. Watching the clock ticking or stopwatch counting is the only way for human to see the time previewed. Time is precious. In man's life, we are controlled by time. We often "chase" after the time and we rushed to get our work done within the limited time.

"Time waits for no man but time surely will make us old men." Modern people used to complain that 24 hour in a day is not sufficient. They wish to have more time, to accomplish their task, more time to while away in the shopping mall, more time to earn more money, or even more time seeking for a life of material comfort. But they will never understand the precious of time and they will not know how to control the time well. Instead of spending their time earning money and seek for more luxurious and wealthy life, they should spend their time doing something meaningful and are beneficial to their life.

"Money cant buy time; Money cant Buy happiness". No matter how rich we are and no matter how much property we own ... All these still cant guarantee our happiness and we still cant buy time. We cant buy time to spend with our family and friends; We cant buy time and return it to someone after wasting their time; And we also cant pay to let the time stop. Time are really precious and priceless. Time are unlike video tapes, which you can rewind and recall the events. People cannot rewind the clock and people can't catch up with time no matter how fast we run after it. Therefore, we should spend more time doing meaningful things in life.

Make full use of the time you have, maximize it and never ever waste the precious time.

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

We are still alive!

2009-06-20T23:17:00.003+08:00

Sorry for not updating this blog due to our mid term exam.
Stay tuned!

DJ on message:~either you're interested or you're not

2009-06-14T11:33:00.002+08:00

The intention when composing a piece of message actually takes quite a lot of effort and sincerity. It's just like wrapping a present for a special someone, and after that you just hope for the best. It's when you hope that the other person will return the pleasant favor as well. If they do, you should be happy.

But the problem starts when the other person do not reply at all. Now this is actually means a lot to the sender. It could just mean that you are not interested, and the effect could be very painful. It's just like handing over a box of chocolate but getting shot at in return. And it is very demotivating. This only applies when the receiver does not reply at all.

When a message sent that does not get a reply actually tells you 1 thing, and there is only one conclusion you can draw out of it. That is, "You're just not interested". Simple as that. And there is no need for a lecturer to explain that.

You see, what I'm trying to say is that when you do not reply a message to someone who sends it to you, it just shows how much you value that relationship. If you reply, you are making an effort in that relationship. When you don't, you're either starting to waste it, or you have already decided to waste the relationship.

I'm not only implying this to a boy-girl messaging. In fact, it does apply to a mother to son messaging, or even coworkers to coworkers, and even friends to friends. These are the relationship that we take it for granted and in fact, some of us even label it as insignificant. Am I right? I could be wrong as well. Do enlighten me if it were wrong.

We usually do not experience this sharp pain untill we experience it first hand. And the effect could be very devastating, espcially when the person means a lot to you. And when you get a niel response, you might just loose yourself. And this is very true. You just have to feel it yourselve.

So the next time you receive a messange from anyone, be it your mother, sibling, friend, or even your special girl or boy friend, just keep in mind that you have two choices which solely depends on your interest. It is either you are interested or you are not...........

So what's on your mind?

DJ online,
-Damian Thomas Khaw

DJ on Storm:~it only takes 1 minute

2009-06-14T11:32:00.002+08:00

As the saying goes, "a miss is as good as a mile." One could never predict the vast implication when a small mistake is made, be it through speech or even through action. Some lucky ones learn this lesson far away from conflict, while some just had to learn it the hard way.

Speech is a great blessing, but it can be a great curse, for while it helps to make our intention and desire known to our fellows, it can also, if we use it carelessly, make our attitude completely misunderstood.

A slip of the tongue is actually not a fault of the mind. In my opinion, a slip of a tounge, the use of an unusual word or of an ambiguous word may create an enemy when we can help to be a friend. Speking of speech, different classes of people use different vocabilaries and the ordinary speech of an educated person may strike an uneducated listener. Again, competency in communication is vital in avoiding misunderstanding. So speech is not really a gift to be used freely witout thought which demands careful thinking.

However, no matter how much a man wants to avoid conflict through speech, one could never assure that you wont encounter a bad experience of communication. This is especially true when an idea of yours is pieced in a way where it might sound offending to another party. And the implication? The reaction was never what you wil expect to see from that person, especially when that person has been nice to you before the conflict is initiated.

The key so dissolve conflict like this actually takes more than solving the issue there and then through means of meta communication. Yes, a few manage to sit through the talk, but how many of us are strong enought to do that? You see, a conflict only happens when a party is offended and a confrontation has taken place. And my point here is that people involved will definitely by emotional. When emotion takes the better of us, rational thinking is totally imbalance. Personally, I had a similar experience as this. And well, it was really hard to think rationally, especially when you're already emotionally involved.

What about the cure? We are familiar with the phrase "Time will heal on it's own". However, time is not the only ingredient to this malacious disease. Empathy and critical thinking is required as well. In an argument, I strongly believe that no one is totally right or wrong. Let's take an argument between a young teenager and an elder as an example. Perhaps, the idea that was suggested sounds reasonable to a young teenager, but it may sound offending to an elder.Well, I also believe that the elder must have his or her won reason to disagree with that young boy. But then again, emphaty from both parties must take place. The elder has to understand that the young boy is still inexperience and he's prone to make mistakes, while the young boy has to think from the elder's point of view. Either way, ego has to be humbled if emphaty has to take place. This is because any egoistic person will always think that he's totally right. And for him to emphatise the other party's view? That will have to wait till the day when pigs fly.

It takes only one minute to end waht seem to be a happy relationship. However, one minute is also what it takes for reconciliation with each other. One spells a longer and stronger bond, while the other will instantly disintegrate that bond.

So the next time you're in a conflict, pick a stand and work towards it. Either you save it, or you leacve it. What's your stand?

DJ online,
-Damian Thomas Khaw

The light in the dark

2009-06-14T11:10:00.000+08:00

Have you ever heard that " Once you choose hope, anything is possible" ? Each and everyday, we struggle with pressure and stress from family and friends, conflict happens due to disagreement, depressions and worst is emotional breakdown.

What does sun raise means to you? Another day to be in hell, continue to suffer and face the ugly real world? Think positive, sun raising in the morning break the darkness in the night, it gives us new hopes! Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark. Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow them.

Hope is like our desire for something to happen, while expecting or being confident that it will come true. Hope also implies a certain amount of perseverance, believing that something is possible even when there is some evidence to the contrary. Hope may be directed toward something minor or towards something extremely significant.

It is true to say hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles. Everything that is done in the world is done by hope. The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started.

One thing I learn so far about hope is despair can come to one another only from other human beings, hope, too, can be given to one only by other human beings.

Take a dagger, poke that ice~

2009-06-11T22:01:00.001+08:00

A wall can be found in your own world once you open your eyes to how you are living...

We create barriers that do not exist outside of our own minds. We see some people as better than us and some as inferior, we look for approval from our peers while rejecting those who do not share our values and beliefs. How can you tear down the walls that keep you separated from the wonderful people in your world?

Perhaps what we could do is look for what we all have in common. Everyone shares the human condition. Everyone is blessed with a lifetime to build themselves up. Regardless of who you are or who you are dealing with, you know with absolute certainty that the person has dreams, hopes, fears and worries just like you do. Even the most confident, self-assured super successful people have worries about the future and regrets about the past. We are all alike. Bear this in mind and you will have more compassion for those you meet and less fear about being yourself.

Look behind the curtain! Don´t be fooled by appearances. That guy driving across town in a new Bentley may well be days away from bankruptcy; the beautiful woman shopping in the mall may not have had a date in months because guys find her intimidating. Even smiling extroverts worry about looking stupid or saying the wrong thing. Sometimes they don´t know when to stop talking and worry about that too! My point is to look for the real person; not what you see on the surface. Listen very carefully to how people express themselves and you will hear subtle changes in voice tone that reveals their true feelings. Think of others as kids playing the game of being adults. We are all dressed up to look like serious adults but deep down we wonder if someone is going to notice we are winging it!

See others as you When talking to people. Remind yourself that at the deepest level that other person is the same as you. This is absolutely true at the quantum level and at the physical, mental and emotional levels apart from minor differences. We are more alike than we are different. A strong foundation is the essence towards a better and lasting relationship. Are you going to be the one to break that ice?

Cute Carrot Chris~
Kute Karrot Khris~

Friendship

2009-06-08T23:05:00.007+08:00

Friendship is a special kind of relationship which we will really cherish in our life. It bonded human being which are not blood related under this kind of relationship. We never know its importance and necessity untill we really experience it. It's like a gift to man kind, a channel of love and affection and an ultimite weapon which can slowly conquer everyone of us. We care bout it so we are often committed to this form of relationship.

We will have lots of friends around us, but not all friend could be addressed as"CLOse". Friends around you can be a "Hi-Bye" friend; a friend that you only throw a smile to; A friend that only keeps you company in class or even a friend that you will only share daily affair with. Moreover, people like us who are now leaving in a competitive society could hardly get a friend which can be named as "CLOSE" friends. A friend that you can share your problems and secrets with. However, everyone will have their own measurement on close friends. And some people might not even have a close friend. They could not expose themselves to others as they might felt insecure, they are worry that everyone around them also have bad intention.

Friends come with friendship. And friendship usually started with a warmth smile and a simple "HI". Its the simplest and most common way but it works all the time. Take the initiative to approach one's around you and you will never the know the next second, friendship already bloom within the two of you. After that don't hesitate to throw appropriate question to them. Its a form of communication so that you could know them better. Try finding a common interest within the both of you, talk more and work on it as it will indirectly bring your friendship into another higher level. Your friendship will be heated and slowly you two will be closer to each other.

Friends are always the one who will be there for us when we needed them. They make us feel secure, comfort, happy, relieved when be with them. We can receive huge support and sincere opinion or advice from them. And as a favour to a friend, you will never expect anything in return as its an offer. An offer to a friend whcih you really cherish.

Be nice, be friendly. Try to make friends with everyone around you and treat everyone as your friend. You will now notice that the world is more lovely and nice if you have friends to be with you ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Ever heard about an ugly girl been selected as the cheerleader?

2009-06-08T10:44:00.002+08:00

Let's have a look at these two people.

The Hill's Heidi was a cute girl but decided to go for plastic surgery.

High School Musical franchise star, Zac Efron's nose is nicer now.

And now, think about what's the reason for them to go for plastic surgery?

"

The only reason is physical attractiveness stereotype.

As societies become increasingly mobile, sophisticated and urbanized, first impressions are important. Attractiveness probably affects our first impressions. Thus, in effect, attractive people do impress people at the first glance. Despite feeling jealous of others being more physically attractive, people tend to prefer to work with, be friends with, hang out with, and look at beautiful people. Physical-attractiveness stereotyping happens across the globe. Think about Snow White and Cinderella fairy-tale stories. Snow White and Cinderella are beautiful, kind, honest, and intelligent. Even children learn the stereotype at the early age. Therefore, in their perception, only good and beautiful people could become princesses. The witch, the stepmother and the stepsisters are ugly, wicked, and evil - they possessed bad traits. For one study they showed pictures of different kids to a group of children, ages 4 to 6. Each child from that group was asked to choose who they’d like to be friends with based on those photos. Surprisingly or not, everyone picked the good looking, slim kids opposite to chubby and/or not so handsome peers. So how does it work, how do we become so prejudiced to the looks of people from such a young age? Why is it so common to think that more attractive people are more successful, happier, or self-confident? On the other hand, why do some perceive people with good looks to be less intelligent, more obnoxious, or less loyal?

Attractiveness is a very subjective matter. While attractiveness is the people of any given place and time find attractive, physical-attractiveness stereotype is the presumption that physically attractive people possess socially desirable traits. Simply said, people tend to presume that attractive people possess good behavior.

Although many may deny it, attractiveness and grooming affect first impressions in job interviews. Attractive people with the required qualification would have greater chance to be selected than average-looking people with the same qualification. This could help explain why attractive people have more prestigious jobs and make more money than their average-looking counterparts. In addition, people tend to think that attractive people could get away with anything. They could get anything they wanted in a whim. With this, the newest tendency that is extremely scary is the fact that the distinct perception of beauty in different cultures is slowly but surely disappearing into thin air. An increasing number of Asian Americans are going for eyelid surgery. The corrective nose surgery and botox treatments are becoming one of the most common and fastest growing types of plastic surgery for both genders. Also, with the promotion of thinness as the “ideal female form.” So many teenage girls and women are being brainwashed that you have to be thin to be beautiful, or you look so beautiful now that you’re tens of pounds lighter than before.

My point is does Beauty save the world? I truly hope so. There ought to be something that will save our civilization from going to hell. However it’s not going to be our fixation with Beauty as it is now. We must learn to see the beauty in every human’s soul, the beauty of nature, and all those things that surround us. We must see beauty in us before seeing it in others instead of go for plastic surgery and change our look.

DJ on Scouting: ~Knots of Life

2009-06-06T15:56:00.003+08:00

“Our relationship is on the line” does that sound familiar to you? The truth is, our relationship with people has always been on the line. And the thickness of the line doesn’t increase, and that’s what makes it so precious to us. That is what drives us to take delicate care on the line. But there is one thing that slips out of people’s mind. That is, no matter what line is it, it is always tied with a knot. Whether or not the relationship fruits, solely depends on how tight the knot is. If it’s loose, it will just slip off and there you have a line that’s lifeless.

You see, the knot represents effort. Why? It’s because you need to put in a certain amount of effort in order to produce the knot. And due to the fact that knot makes ties strings together, it show that there’s energy. The tighter the knot is, the warmer the relationship. And relationship varies from person to person, it is reverence when directed to parents; companionship when flows towards friends; passion when it is felt towards the partner; respect when it moves towards elders; kindness when drawn towards children.

Soft Tender Respect in Growth is what makes up the word STRING. None can ever deny that in what ever relationship is may be, these 3 elements, Softness of one’s heart, tenderness through caring, and respect are the keys to keeping and maintaining the string. Should anyone decide at any point of time to not maintain that string, it will frail and might just break out of the extreme pressure, be it depression or rejection.

Well, there are no textbook ways to maintain a string. Just like splicing in scouting, each splice has its own usage, and it can only be used under specific condition. Keeping that in mind when maintaining a relationship, everyone has his or her own way of keeping friends. Some are externally warm; some doesn’t show much emotion but keep their friends close at heart, while some are passively warm. The underlining fact is that as long as the spirit of companionship never dies, you can be assured that the sting will never frail.

Well, knowing that the thickness of the string will never increase, but the strength of the knot may increase, it all comes down to how much effort one puts into tying that knot. It could be a permanent strong knot, or it could just loosen up over time. So what’s your knot?

DJ online,

-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

DJ on Neutrlisation(pH 7): HCL+ NaOH--NaCL + H2O

2009-06-06T15:54:00.003+08:00

Back in high school, we learned that Acid mixed with Bases, and acid mixed with Alkali will give us salt and water. Salt and water is a product of a process known as neutralization, with a pH 7. pH 7 in chemistry is actually the neutral state of a mixture. It is neither acidic nor alkali. Of course, if the mixture were to have a pH 6, it would give acidic property, while a pH 8 would give an alkali property. To many, a slight change in pH would not be an issue to fuss over with. However, a vast difference in pH would bring about much trouble, it would either turn very sour, or it would turn very bitter.

Applying that knowledge to human communication, by taking pH values as the degree of interest in a conversation, which could be either interesting or not, it could actually serve as a prediction to whether your conversation partner is interested to communicate with you again. Still can’t see the connection, can you?

You see, in a conversation, it could either be dull or interesting. While pH 7 serves as a neutral stand, pH 1 and pH 14 serves as the extreme, with pH1 indicating an extremely dull conversation, while pH 14 indicating an extremely interesting conversation. Now, this is only a small fraction to the whole communication equation. You see, whether or not your conversation partner looks forward to your next conversation actually depends on the pH value of your current conversation. For example, if your conversation is at a pH value of 1, you might just blow off your chance to have another conversation with your current partner. Now you might be thinking that pH 14 is the best, but I assure you not. Why? Well, if your conversation were to have a pH reading of 14, which is extremely interesting, you might have a hard time keeping up to your partner’s expectation. So if you fail to deliver the same amount or more satisfaction, you might have the possibility of loosing your partner’s interest in you, which is as good as a pH 1 conversation.

Well, as you can see the key to an ongoing and interest motivated conversation is not to be on any extreme side, but to balance the interesting and dull. Too interesting will keep your partner entertained but might back fire you the next time if you are unable to deliver the same level of satisfaction, which could be pictured as a one hit wonder kind of thing. Too dull will just kill your chance of talking to your partner again, which can be pictured as a suicide plan. So the key is to be at pH 7. A slight increase or decrease will actually keep your partner hanging and wanting for more. Why? See, if your conversation decreases a little in pH value, it will keep your partner wondering what happened to you, and he or she might just ask you more questions and show more concern. If your conversation has a little increase in pH reading, you can be pictured as a little boy giving a little girl a kiss on the cheek and run away after that, leaving the girl in a fascinated, entertained, and surprised (in a good way) mode. It is like drugs that keeps your partner wanting for more.

Well, one can argue that the equation is not as simple as how I proposed. No doubt it cannot cover the whole picture. Definitely you will have factors like history with the partner and mutual understanding as disapproving factors. For example, one can argue that a dull conversation will not dissatisfy a long married couple, in which you will find a long history of knowledge between them. However, what is proposed here is only a theory that serves as a general statement, which is not totally wrong, and neither totally right.

Well, in general, the key to keep your conversation partner interested in your next conversation is to tap into his or her interest and get out, which is a conversation with a pH value of 6 or 8. Too much or too little of it will just kill their interest.

So, what is the conclusion? Is to try to keep it at a pH 7 level, where you keep them hanging and interested. Try experiment this theory, you might just find it fascinating on how true or how false it is to you. Either way, it is worth your 5 minutes finding out!!!

DJ online,

-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

An Approach

2009-06-05T02:03:00.013+08:00

Thing started off on a lovely afternoon. I can't exactly remember the date but what I could recall is that it was a Thursday. I bump into him at the pathway above our college while i was heading to a fastfood outlet to have my lunch. Didn't expect to met him there. As usual, he was in black and was walking alone with his earphone listening to music. At that moment, I was telling myself, "Come on, you can do it! Just don't let go the opportunity again."

At that moment, without considering the situation, consequences and people around, I walked directly to him. I started off the conversation with a "HI!" and a smile, which I think it is appropriate == He then replied me with a softly spoken HI and slowly removing his earphone. And his expression? It was interesting "~ I think at that moment he was trying to express that he was shocked and didn't expect me to talked to him.

I didn't let the conversation continued with an awkward silent. I continued the conversation by asking him was him previously having tuisyen at *****? He then answered me YES. After that, I cant imagined what a stupid answer I gave. It was " Ooh, I see. No wonder you looks so familiar." LOL, stupid answer isn't it == Even now when I recalled what I had said, I also felt like taking the words back and give him a better answer.

After that, I asked him for his name and I also introduced myself to him. And I remember the last sentence that I told him before ending the conversation is "Do say HI if we see each other in the college." and he replied me with a warm smile. I knew that this was not a good way to end the conversation, however I was so happy and satisfy that day. I was thinking that at least after 2 years I finally dare to make the first move. Even tough it was a simple conversation and it started off with a random talk, but it also signifies a good starting for our friendship.

The day after that, I met him at the corridor. It was during the lunch hour and the corridor was crowded with students, but I still managed to spot him out easily from the crowd. And the non-verbal communication that takes place between us at that moment was a simple and sweet "SMILE" on our face. It just happened within few seconds when we passed by each other, and may be it was just a simple face expression which does not mean anything to others, but to me, it signifies that he accepted our friendship ", And it also mean that both of us could actually still remember yesterday's conversation clearly and did what we had promised.

However after few weeks of non verbal communication that taken place between us, I was told by a friend of mine that he was "no longer available". At that moment, my heart was like experiencing a hard crash. I was so sad. I felt like I'm an idiot doing something foolish. I was sad not because he already "taken". It just simply beacuse I looks so stupid approaching someone who already had a partner. And he, probably will just see my approach as a joke. But after this incident, we tend to smile lesser to each other and even sometimes we will just pass by each other and pretend like we did not see each other. Even myself also don't know what causes things to changed, and why is this happening. And till now, we are still communicating with a smile. Nothing happened more than that, and not even another conversation.

But putting this aside, I was actually quite proud of myself for making the first move and starting the communication within us. I have a friend who always tells me that : "When things ended up in this way, you really cant help it. But, at least he did noticed you. And a smile had really signified a good start." THANKS, my friend ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Not ANOTHER Maths?!

2009-06-02T22:11:00.011+08:00

Another week has passed and once again I am attending my usual Tuesday's Marketing class. Somehow time progressed quickly during that full period. Soon, everyone was allowed to leave. I bid farewell to the presence that were next to me as she parts seperate ways. I then proceed to my following lecture which was Statistics. During the ongoing lecture, I was laid back and calm. The attention level was at its minimal as I was feeling tired and drained out for the day. Relaxed, I venture into the state of mind.

In life, there are ones who succeed and those who "fail". In business, people do "fail". In sports, people do "fail". Even in relationship, people do "fail". Almost in every aspect of life, there will bound to be failures.

A couple of years back I watched Jimi Hendrix playing guitar on tv, and he was having a blast. He made it look so easy. So, I thought I want to play the guitar. I grabbed my Dad and went to a guitar shop near our house. I thought it would be fun and challenging to get involved in playing guitar. Over a short period of time, I bought a classical guitar, a few training books and a DVD; having to cost at least RM700. A few weeks passed. I played terrible and hated the experience. I hated it primarily because I performed awfully and that made me very uncomfortable. I left the guitar at the corner of my store room and haven't played since, until a year later. I didn't blame the training books that fail to deliver the appropriate skills because I'm not playing victim. I know what happened. I didn't fail at playing the guitar; I quit. The fact I didnt performed to my expectation is very similar to someone not having immediate success in different aspects of life. What I'm sure of, is that every person who is a professional guitarist has had days where they didn't play to thier expectations. But they certainly didn't quit. They stick to it. Thier interest in guitar is greater then thier interest in quitting. The truth is, I didn't fail playing guitar. I quit playing guitar. All the millions and millions of people who have guitars in thier store room and aren't playing them now didn't fail at playing guitar either. They quit.

The true facts are, it takes no effort to quit. So when you hear that most people fail at a particular situation, picture all those golf clubs in people's garage, all the gym memberships that are inactive, all the inhome exercise equipment that has clothes hanging on them and haven't been used in months and all the musical intruments sitting unused in thier cases. If someone was to claim that most will fail if they enroll in a particular lecture or most don't make money in newtork marketing, ask them to put it into perspective and compare to all the other things people attempt to do. If they have integrity, they will say it isn't any different. Most people quit at everything. I picked up the guitar a year later and devoted myself into learning the basics. It wasn't perfect but I did well since. Just like anyone who has ever accomplish great things in thier life. The decision someone makes on the day they get involved or the day they start a business is not the important one. The important one is the decision they make when they realize what is it really going to take to succeed. Nike wouldn't pay Tiger Woods 100 million dollars to wear thier logo if he was only some ordinary golfer. Tiger is great because he worked his guts out. It isn't any different if one wants to succeed in anything. What one needs to learn to accomplish that in life is communication skills. And communication skills is just like a golf swing. Its something you learn NOT something you're born with. That's why its called a "skill". People don't fail at things. They quit before they learned the necessary skills to do them. So failing is never an option.

I was then reminded by a couple question that seems irrelevant when it is logically analyzed.
If I want to get fit, what are the odds that I actually will?
If I studied hard, what are the chances of me getting a HD in maths?
If I am nice, what are the odds of me scoring that girl?

HUH?
That seems like an irrelevant question to me. Why? Because:

Odds has nothing to do with me getting off the couch and tossing that potato chips into the thrash.
Odds has nothing to do with me studying hard and completing assignments.
Odds has nothing to do with me being attentive to a particular girl.

Odds are incorrectly used when performance comes in where it may ALTER the chances.

If I roll a die, there is NO performance involved.So, what are the odds?
Someone can say the odds of rolling a 5 is 1/6.

or

If I flip a coin, there is NO performance involved.
So, the odds are 50/50 or 1/2.

HOWEVER

If I'm trying to putt a little white ball into a hole in a golf course, there is performance involved.If I'm trying to build a business, there's performance involved.If I'm trying to learn to play the guitar, there's performance involved.
Hence, odds cannot come into play.

A firm and yet familiar voice then interrupted me. I withdrew my thoughts and brought myself back to reality. It was my lecturer. I was required to answer a particular question given by her. However, I wasn't able to catch her full question as I wasn't being attentive. A short moment of silence follows and soon she herself gave the answer. Perhaps the unintended leak in my non-verbal communication clearly shows I wasn't following along with the class. After a brief moment, the class ended. As I walked through the corridor, a very intersting phrase seized my attention.

"Great Minds have Purpose, Little Minds have Wishes"

With that in mind, I smiled to myself and continued home.

Cute Carrot Chris~
Kute Karrot Khris~

Chemistry is the crazy form of getting it

2009-06-02T18:42:00.010+08:00

Relationship without communication? It sounds like trying to swim without water in the pool. Relationship without non-verbal communication? It is even more like trying to swim through ice cube. Verbal communication is a necessary tool in any type of relationship but how about nonverbal communication? Does the ability of communication through body language and facial expressions play as a huge factor in a relationship?

Try to imagine, a gentle touch of strong hands that can be reassuring in times of doubt and indecision, a loving smile framed by eyes that peer into one's soul, warms the heart and evokes feelings of passion and sincere longing, the closeness of a caring caress and finally followed by a soft kiss. It obviously shows that the power of non-verbal communication is often taken for granted in the context of relationships.

Think about the last time you changed your mind about a restaurant or movie. Did the conversation also include a shy little smile, just the kind you like or a finger lightly trailing up your arm. Maybe you got you hair played with and the batting of her eyes. All of these actions are non-verbal, and are the things that really open up the lines of understanding.

We all know and recognize when someone is speaking. Lips are moving and breathing is choppy, but that's only the minority of it. Have you ever heard " Action speaks louder than word"? It can often express what words cannot, and communicates when words are inappropriate. It is a more sincere showing of how one feels, when the validity of one's verbal commitments are in question. The words "I love you" can sometimes feel empty without being accompanied by a kiss. Caring can become a void concept without the outward sharing of some physical interaction. The right words can aptly express how one feels, but an expression of affection through the use of non-verbal communication shows how one feels. At times, it could be as simple as holding hands.

Sometimes, the best way to make a person feel better or to simply let them know they're needed and loved is to kiss them on the forehead, give them a hug, make eye contact and smile or just touch their shoulder or rub their back. Motion, gestures and eye contact, however, never lie.

Smile ",

2009-06-01T18:30:00.001+08:00

What can you see from this picture. Did the scenery manage to catch your attention? Or are you looking at the birds? Well, the first message i got from this picture was the simley face formed by the 3 birds. Isn't it very beautiful ^^ Instead of observing many different smiley face on people, did the smiley face that appear during noon in the sky manage to impress you?

Smiling can act as a sign of language on a person's expression. It is also one of the facial expression that can appear not only on human, but also on an animal. A simple and sweet smile can actually bring different meanings to different people who interpret it. Meanings vary when you smile to a different people and people also tend to receive a different message from your smile. And there is no definite or particular way to interpret a smile.

A smile given after a person received a gift or a reward. It means THANK YOU!
Smile when you see you friends or lecturers. It means HELLO
Smile after a handshake from someone whom you first know. It means NICE TO MEET YOU!
Sometimes when you want to approach someone, start with a warm eye-contact combined with a smile. It's like hinting to the person, CAN WE BE FRIENDS?
Even when you are not listening to someone, do respond them with a smile. It means SORRY, I was not listening just now ==
When you enter a shop or restaurant, a smiley face from the waiter/ waitress/ cashier/ worker of the shop means WELCOME!
Smiling to your boyfriend/ girlfriend after a kiss. It means I LOVE YOU!

Smiling is like a beautiful magic attending a person's soul. Even without talking, a smile can also fully represent the untold feeling and words of yours. It can even be more wonderful when someone manage to gauge and receive the right message from your smile. It is nice to smile as it can also make people around you to feel happy and warm.

However, some people tend to blame others for not smiling. They will interpret those who don't smile as a snobbish, arrogant and even as an isolated person. This is actually a very bad perception that people could come out with. Can't they just try to put themselves in others' shoe and try to think of their feeling. May be that particular person just happened to be emo and in a bad mood that day, and we actually cant force them to smile. Even sometimes, it might just be a conincidence that the person did not see you and they didn't smile to you. You cant expect people to smile all the time even when they are alone?! And by that time when people see someone who smiles too often, they will actually address the person as a "psycho person".

In short, do enjoy observing the smiley face of people. Noticing the cheek dimples appearing on the smiley face, noticing them smiling with their mouth open and showing their teeth can actually make us feel happy. How about you? Have you smile today? Try throwing a "killer smile" to someone and you will know what wonderful effect it will bring ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

DJ on Physics: when Effort (E) = Force (F)

2009-05-31T14:48:00.001+08:00

Can Effort (E) = Force (F), the physics equation be related to life, the human communication of life. Does it give a positive value or does it in turn give a negative value? We are familiar with the way people accept and reject us. However, little attention is paid to whether or not that acceptance or rejection is due to the effort put in. But there will come a time where we’ll all come to a point of time where we ponder whether extra effort in a conversation will give bigger impact in communication, especially when it involves the people we treasure. It not only works for the people we care about, but it also works on everyone, regardless of who they are, and their status. For a competent speaker, the E matters a lot.

In physics, force is a vector quantity, which means that is has direction of propagation, taking that F1 + F2 =F3 (note: F is Force). When the F1 and F2 forces are acting in the same direction, the F3 would result in a bigger force. How ever, if the F1 and F2 are acting in a different direction, repulsion occurs, therefore, F3 will be a “0” value, or even a negative value. Therefore, if a positive F3 is desired, the force of either F1 or F2 has to be larger than the other in order to obtain a positive result.

This principle can be used in our life, taking F1 and F2 as the effort used of two people in a conversation, while the F3 represents the velocity of their conversation. To critically think it, the result of F3 greatly depends on the attitude of F1 and F2 in the conversation. If either one of them were to be less interested, the F3 , resultant force would be dissatisfactory. Therefore, F1 or F2 has to put in more effort if a good conversation were to be achieved. And the answer to why either F1 or F2 is less interested could be dependent on these few factors, namely tiredness, stress from work, conflict of interest and many more. To overcome this imbalanced equation, cracking a joke to ease the tension, or even talking about the subject’s interest and even listening extra hard would be a great catalyst. However, many a times, the less interested party fails to acknowledge the extra effort put in. But on the other hand, some might realize the extra F in the Equation and work extra hard to balance it, now this is the exception in our human “physics” world.

But bear in mind that realizing the imbalanced force in the equation might not lead to a positive integer. It could also bring about negative values. For instance, let’s take a boy chasing a girl for instance. Naturally, when a boy likes a girl, he would put in extra effort to make the girl happy. Now many a times, whether or not the girl is interested or not will affect the F3 resultant force. If it’s a yes, then F1+F2=F3, with F3 as a positive integer. But if it’s a no, then the extra effort might just remain at a “0” constant value, or it could backfire and travel done the negative line. So this proves that Effort doesn’t always = Force.

From the examples given above, it could be derived that F1 and F2 are independent of each other. F1 will do it’s part while F2 on the other hand would react to personal feelings and interest on F1. The F3 varies from situation to situation. If a positive value were to be obtained, we could be sure that the F3 would accelerate and increase in Velocity (V).
However, if a negative value were to be obtained, the situation is best handled by the potential contributor at that point of time. The rule states that in normal circumstances, F3 would either be a constant value, a “0” value or a negative value. But the exception is when F3 is a positive value and increasing.

However the situation maybe, or however the resultant force may be, the most important factor in a conversation equation is the willingness from both sides of the party to contribute and to give a chance to each other in a conversation. More chance= more open mindedness= higher chance of a high F3. And the equation can work the other way.

Effort (E) = Force (F) is an applicable physics concept in our human “physics” communication. The mechanism remains the same, but the subject varies, and so does the Resultant Force (F3). As how Einstein words it in his renowned second law of motion: “Every action has a reaction”.

Therefore the conclusion is:
· The Resultant force (F) in the case of F1 + F2= F3 is dependent on situational factors and personal contribution.
· The Effort (E) = Force (F) theory is proven workable in Human Communication.

DJ online,
DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

DJ on Honesty:~The longest Walk

2009-05-31T11:39:00.005+08:00

80, 95, 78… it was the 1st semester of 5th Form examination as I could recall. Everybody was delighted to receive their Additional Mathematics results, while I on the other hand was on the opposite side of the river. Well, guess what? I was the last to receive. In fact, Mrs. Tay didn’t call out my name at all! Chiti-chiti Bang Bang! As I expected, she wanted to have a private chat with me. As I recalled, her tone was more than of a concerned and upset one than an angry one. The red ink on my paper showed 20….

The fact is, I will be facing my add math tuition teacher that very same afternoon, whom my parents have work so hard to pay her fees. The point is, it is definitely not pleasing at all for her to know that I’ve been doing so badly all these while, and what more; I’ll be sitting for my SPM examination in a few months time! In fact, it must be disappointing and frustrating for her to know that she failed to teach me well. That whole day in school, I had a dilemma on whether to tell her the truth and admit that I really needed help or not. She always thought that I did well in school. And the fact that she’s a strict teacher made me think quintuple more on whether to burst the balloon or not.

I truly agree that time and tide waits for not man. As much as I wanted to be straight and truthful to her, I just couldn’t. When class dismissed that afternoon, I was the 1st to leave the class. Don’t even think about my marks, she didn’t even have the chance to ask me. As soon as I got out of her house, I paddled as hard as I could.

It’s just 50 meters to my house when I decided to stop. I stood at the side of the street and started to think, and I thought hard. You see, as much as I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth, I couldn’t tell a lie either. I just couldn’t. It’s such a shameful secret that I’ve kept from her so long. I guess that the fact that I know she’s willing to spent extra time and effort to help me prompted me to do what is right. At that point of time, I knew what I had to do, and I realize the reason why I shied away from telling her the truth. It was simply because I was scared. I was just too afraid to see her angry and disappointed. The thought of this really demotivated me. But I told myself that if I can’t be truthful now, when am I going to learn to be truthful? How are people suppose to trust me if I do not start now?It was the hardest thing to do; it really isn’t, especially when it involves telling the right thing to the right person at the right time, and knowing that at that right moment, that right person will be less than happy. I didn’t know what gave me the courage, but all I remember was picking up my bike and the rest took place naturally.

I could still remember myself sitting on her bench in her garden, letting go of my tears. For how long was it, I couldn’t remember. I told her everything, about how I started to fail and how lightly I took it. She knew I was jus as disappointed as she is. I could still recall her saying: “Damian, you have made some mistakes, it’s still not too late to catch up. I’ll help you, ok? You do your part, and I’ll do mine. Don’t worry…” those were the exact words she told me. And that was the first time in 5 years I saw the soft side of her, it was very comforting and motivating.

Honesty is like a magic that amazes you in ways you can hardly imagine. The truth hurts, but it is a wound that heals well along with time, whereas a lie is a cancer that breaks out and never subsides. Frankness and directness is still the best approach the most difficult task. Ironic isn’t it? The hardest thing in the world is always the right thing to do. It should have been the other way around, but unfortunately in our world that we live in; it just doesn’t work that way. The world could be so much of a better place if only HONESTY were part of our NATURAL human communication.

What took place that day was a real turning point in my life. I learnt the hard way that I have to shame the devil and admit my weakness in order to be stronger. But that was only a small drop of what honesty can bring me. We always hear that honesty is the best policy. I might have loose my respect that day, but it certainly got me to the right place in the end. The best road to take isn’t always the smoothest road, nor is it the lousiest. You just have to search a little deep down your heart and grab it tightly as u take that road. You loose out in the poor construction of the road, but at the end of the road is what makes you stronger each time you travel it. You loose some, but you definitely gain some. And sometimes the reward is heftier than your effort. You will never loose out, never.

That evening, I could not be more than glad that I made the right choice to tell the truth. To some, this story is just another lame joke. But to me, it’s more than a turning point of my life; it was a turning point that drove me to elevate myself each day. It was a turning point that altered my attitude that made me who I am today, and still elevating.
Trotting down the road with my bicycle beside me, I took a slow walk back home. It was the longest but the happiest walk of my life, not because of any reason, it was simple because I found a very precious key to human communication that day, and I used it………….

DJ online,
DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

A little closer to heaven

2009-05-31T02:33:00.009+08:00

The morning was still gloomy. Sensing an early start to the day, I strecthed out my arms on to the nearby chair from my bed in order to reach out for my phone. I had to reassure myself on the current time. Unable to retrieve the phone in range, I pushed myself further until I had a grip on the smooth surface of the phone. The time shows 11.30 in the morning! At that moment, I was instantly reminded about the gathering at 1 in the afternoon. With the limited time, I rushed to prepare myself for the occasion.

Then there I stood at the gates of my former high-school, Victoria Institution. Surprisingly, the essence of time hasn't effected much on the school. The surrounding is still very familliar to me. I then proceed towards the school hall. On my way, I was interrupted with a couple of familiar voices and faces. A short talk and I was soon met up with my acquaintances. I was then invited by my friend, Jacky to enquire about a part job nearby Pavillion. However, I was to be brought alone there. I accepted the invite. An hour passed, I had to part ways with my aquaintances for the period but was to be reunited for a movie at 5 in the evening.

Eventually, I was infront of the building where the company was after a long walk. I was debriefed by my friend on the way regarding the job. However, suspicion starts to rise when a couple of my questions were intendedly avoided or covered by similar, unrelated answers. According to him, I was brought there to learn more about the company. At the entrance, I was introduced to an attractive young lady. Hazel was her name. I asked more in detail and was enlightened to know that she's only 19 and a college student working for the company. Curiosity still clouded my mind as I still do not have any idea on the work that I'm supposed to deal with. Infact, the company name was also absent from my knowledge.

THIS IS WHERE THE FUN STARTS!

Soon, I was lead by her into the office lobby. There, I was introduced to the company name and a brief history on it. DHCL/SYN was the company's name and the products? Estabel and Lampe Berger. The company was quite familiar to me. Its one of those multi-level marketing operating companies. That company itself has scamming related issues from what I've heard. In addition to that, MLM equals to network marketing which also equals to pyramid system which is already doomed by its organizational structure. The product is not the incentive to join an MLM. Its more of an excuse to attempt to legitimate the real money-making scheme through expansion. It's practically "the cover" to make it seem legal.

Later, I was asked about my knowledge on network marketing. I was entertained by the play so I tagged along the game and told her that this would be my first time hearing that. Next, I was brought for a tour on the variety of products ranging from RM 300 to RM 85,000! Not forgetting the nicely designed spa with a touch of French interior. I was then brought into another office and was followed up with 2 hours of lecture with her boyfriend, Farez. Thier persuasive skills? Excellent. Presentation skills? Outstanding. Manipulative Skills? Top-notch. An entertaining play of how communication is able to twist your mind and deteriorate your judgement. They played with the big cash and roll with the nice cars to create an impression that will hook any regular teens. I was constantly reminded not to look at the big figure as the "model" to start the business. Instead, to focus more on the large sums of gain in the very near future. To make the plot even more real, I was pointed to several fancy car's nearby which was claimed to be the owned by members of the company. The car ranges from Nissan Fairlady, Mazda Rx8 to an unknown Ferrari.

If it wasn't for the knowledge of the company, I would have been absorbed into buying "the dream" plan. All I had to do for that moment was forcefully smile myself on some of the sweet and thoughtful remarks. I was then plague with the thought that my friend might be a victim of the scheme. Later on the night, I was invited for a treat. A "yum cha" session tomorrow with my friend, the both of them and few other ones which I met there. Accepting the quick and seemingly generous offer? Thats for you to figure out. ;)

Cute Carrot Chris~

Kute Karrot Khris~

Cherish

2009-05-29T00:24:00.002+08:00

Could you remember when was the last time you had actually lean on your parents arm and listening them talking softly to you? When was the last time you threw a tantrum to your parents and acting like a pampered child? AND when was the last time you had actually tell you parents that you love them? Are all these memories still remain in your brain or even in a corner of your heart.

As we grow older, the "rate of forgetting" in a person will increase. People tempt to forget many things that had happened, no matter how important it was to us or how much we cherished it in the past. Sometimes, even though u tired hard to recall what was the missing part, you just could not recall anything. And parents, siblings, friends and teachers will tend to put the blame on us and condemn a lot about our memory power. However memory and our tendencies to forget things are happening beyond what we can control.

God created every living things on this earth. And all of the living things have their own life-cycle. God had also created us to be born under our recent family and people we meet in our life now are believed to be destined by God. There is a saying "The person you had met in your life now will actually be a passer by in your next life; while the passers by in your life now could actually plays an important role in your next life." Have you heard of it before and what you think about it? Well, for me it's not a superstitious believe but I will not 100% believe in it. And I could rationally tell that this might happened, but it might just be a conincidence.

However I always bear this sayings in mind to remind me to cherish everything and everyone that appears in my life. I understand that in my next life, I probably will not have the same family members beside to support me anymore; I would not have the same gang of friends that could spend time with anymore. And everyone around us will be playing a different role in the next life-cycle. Therefore we should treasure the people and things around us. Moreover, none of us will know what will happen tomorrow or even few weeks later. Mishaps and incidents could occur anytime and bring away the live of someone we loves.

Well, it's still not too late to cherish your friends, lecturers, your love ones, and especially your family members starting from tomorrow. Just bear in mind and perform the action of "CHerish". Or else time flies by, people passes by and by that time it is too late for you to regret.

And to my other companions that have been posting about relatioship recently "~ Do cherish your love ones and people who love you ",

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Ends with a smile

2009-05-28T09:00:00.012+08:00

This is a post for someone that I made a deal with.

Few days ago, I was looking through my personal blog about whatever that I had written down in the past. Looked back to the stories in my life especially high school memories that I miss a lot and I realized that high school is the place for most of us to discover every new thing. I entered the school without a single friend when i was form 1. Well,the beginning of the high school life was scary for me because everyone seemed to have their own group and I was this lost kid. Fortunately, I managed to make few friends from my class and then followed by other classes. People say it is hard to get close friends in high school but i think is even harder to leave them, and impossible to forget them especially you have been hanging out together with them during school time and outings. It is like one day we'll wave hello, and wish we never had to say good-bye. All of us started out as total strangers in the same school and ended as friends.

I have this friend, a very close friend of mine now. I cannot remember how we met each other because he was this little shy boy that did not talk much or I should say I barely see him talk. We started to talk and hang out when we were form 2 because we were in the same club and I had my moral class at his classroom. Besides, I always walked to his class for my friends after recesses or classes and of course I talked to him before I went back to my class. Things were a little bit different when we were in form 3, rumours like who like who started to spread around so we ended up to be a couple and we kept it low so that others will not know about. However, eveyone found out which I do know how. I guess because the shcool is not that big, everyone knows everyone especailly it comes to gossip. Anyway, we broke up after PMR.

Sad huh?

Personally, I do not think so. It is true to say that it was very awkward after that because we were in the same class in form 4 and we did not talk much after broke up. However, we managed to avoid the awkward thing between us. So we were back to last time, close friend again, even closer than the past! Still, some of my friends kept on telling me stuff like "you guys look good together, dont waste it" and of course nothing happen in between. Eventually, I figured it there is not anything between us other than frinedship after a very long time. I was very happy about the conclusion that I made it because I took a long time to figure it out.

I got to admit that he is a good listener. We talk about everything as in everything like lame jokes, problems and so on. Always patiently listen to me whenever I cannot deal stuff by myself and give advices as well. A very caring friend for everyone because he will never dump you alone at anywhere. Trust me, I made him to go shopping with me by telling what if I went missing if I take cap alone or all kind of crap and it works! Now, he thinks that I'm very good at making others to feel guilty by stories, haha. I am really glad that he found his loved one now, everyone is very happy for them because they been through a lot before they reached the point.

See, we are close friends now. I have seen my friends do not even care about their exes once they are done with each other which I do not think is a good way. It is always better to have a friend instead of stranger. Listening and communicating with each other help in a way.

Interesting

2009-05-27T22:46:00.007+08:00

Class was conducted differently for the "Human Communication" lecture session yesterday. It was Mr. James who temporarly conducted the class. He did a good job on enlightening everyone about ADVERTISING and what mass communication is roughly about. It was interesting and informative. I do gain a lot from him throughout the 1 and 1/2 hours ^^ And the best thing is, it managed to inspire me to post something here on the blog regarding "ADVERTISING".

I would like to share with you a creative advertisement which I found on the INTERNET. And guess what, yesterday MR James mentioned that in Malaysia advertisement, "exposing Armpits" are prohibited. Weird right ?! I was quite surprised to hear that too "~

Advertising its actually a word that has been used and mentioned quite commonly among everyone of us. But it actually have many meanings and elaboration behind it. It could also be related to many kind of things around us. And Mr. James yesterday related advertising to "BRAND", and after his further explanation I do understand how can these two words can be closely related to each other.

However, I think many of us probably will have the wrong perception and rigid thinking on advertisement. We often will feel suspicious about the truthfulness of a particular advertisement. But ADVERTISEMENT is actually a part of mass comuunication. They are exist to introduce products and things to people who needed them. Electronic and printed media could actually make their plans work.

Talking about advertising had actually reminds me about a conversation occured in a taiwan drama "STARLIT", which I think it could clearly define advertising. This is how the conversation like : - "Advertisement is actually not meant to promote or sell products. They are exist to fulfill people's dreams and to provide people with their desires. Moreover, every advertisement acutally have the objective to exploit people's need. They are trying to express different necessity in people and providing people with the things they desired. And perhaps providing people with the things they desired will be the most happy and wonderful act in the universe."

So the next time when u see a billboard or an advertisement on TV or papers, do stop by and spend time reading it. Try to discover what are they trying to advertise beacause it might be advertising something that u desired. And perhaps they are able to make your dream comes true. Do appreciate the hardwork and effort of a creative director ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

A darker day..

2009-05-27T00:28:00.005+08:00

Until a recent point, life was progressing in order in align with my personal expectations. Contented with the moment, I tried making the best for myself and for the ones I know. Unexpected by the complexity that was bound to occur, I was moving on in life effortlessly. However, that was about to change. 25th May 09; the mark of a period of sorrow. It was 8.53 in the night when a sudden beep on my phone interupts my tv programme. Uncertain and peculiar on whom it may be, I rushed towards my phone. At that instant, my soul slides away just with the sight of the sender. It was my ex.

It all started on the first month of this year. Infact it was just after the Christmas and New Year celebrations when it begin. During then, we will exchange texts through our phone for hours. Myself being the more playful one, while she, the humble and sweet one. I was captivated by the moment. I was in what would most call "love". Soon enough, she initiated the starting move with the request to be together or remain friends. At that moment, I couldn't refuse the more favorable offer. So I made the choice that seemed right. However, she was inclined towards speaking Mandarin while English was my mother tongue. Nevertheless, it was all good. That was the only flaw. Everything else was perfect.

Soon, she applied for a full-time job at a pyramid-shaped mall. It was a convience for her as she was living across the road. I was reassured by her that everything will remain the same. Things did. All the outings we shared was at the same venue which was at her working place. It was only a few weeks later where she got busy. Unsatisfied, I seek advice from associates. Perhaps doing so caused my judgement to sway from reality. One thing was in mind; a breakup. Pending my abrupt decision, I placed effort to construct a better relationship than the current. However, condition remained the same. Being pressured, I made the bold move; somewhere in March. It was only fair for me to end what she had started. Trying to ease the current condition, I suggest being back to just friends. Unfortunately, she was not in mind with me.

She was saddened over the inevitable situation. So was I. The first two weeks after that was a huge downfall in life. Without fail, a text with only the phrase "I miss u" was left by her through the phone messaging system. Feeling even more distraughted by that, I avoided her in any way possible. The occurance of the same text reappearing became less and less. Nonetheless, from time to time, it still occurs. When it does, I would ask about her welfare and the reason to her texts which will then be followed by short arguments. Replies were always the same; bad state and more of the same phrase. She left her job and started college soon. It was then I stopped hearing from her. Gradually, I proceed with life and regained my light back. Everything was going accordingly until her recent text haunts me again. I replied and told her about my first blog. However, as usual, a few replies and then argument follows. I know she would be reading this. And when you do, I hope you can leave me alone as promised. Perhaps an alternate crosshair will be the best for me, where then, I will only be a shot away from that particular one ;). With that, I end my worries along with my post.

*Done by request*

Cute Carrot Chris~
Kute Karrot Khris~

Sit still, Shut up and Listen

2009-05-26T18:55:00.013+08:00

Have you ever found yourself saying "uh huh" or " I'm sorry,what did you say " when one is talking to you or being annoyed by others that are doing that to you as well? Do you know that people can always find out whether you are not listening to them or not through your actions like distractions from a mobile phone, interruptions or even shifty eyes.

Talked to your loved one about some difficulty you were having and the respond you got back was " I don't know what to tell you "? This kind of respond that will make you to feel isolated, neglected, or even abandoned at times. This is exactly why one of the leading complaints in relationships is that one partner feels the other is not listening to them or their needs?

We all want to talk but so few wish to listen. We always think that we are a good communicator. In order to communicate effectively, we have to be able listen what the speaker says. These days we lay so much emphasis on the intellect that we are close our heart and remove the beating moment to moment in our life because we are not listening anymore.

Try to imagine, how would you feel if you are truly listened by someone when you talk about what you wanted? The feeling of being cared about, important and understood. Listeners give responds like " Keep going, I enjoy listening to you ", " I want to hear it more ", loved. " What's your opinion ", " What do you think " or allows the speaker finishes his talk and wait for a while before you reply, respected. The important of listening is this!

While listening seems to constitute half of any conversation, I strongly believe that listening is the most important part of any communication. Always remember, listening is the key for any kind of successful relationship.

DJ on Goodbye: Genuinely Special

2009-05-26T08:43:00.004+08:00

“A goodbye is never painful unless you’re never going to say hello again.” Goodbye messages could be conveyed through speech, songs, and actions and even on written materials like cards. Some may experience a painful one; some sorrowful; some are more than happy; most of us, casual. What took place last Friday was genuinely special to me.

My calendar marked 22nd of May, 2009. The time on my watch on my right hand read 0230 hrs. “There goes another scout camp” I said to myself as Daniel and I made our way to our HMC Leadership Camp camper’s spot. A Daniel and I were making our way down to the lower foyer of campus; we observe a pool of people. Some are campers, some are non-campers. Well, the honest, there was a group of friends waiting to bid goodbye, but I could clearly spot one alone. As soon as my eyes caught hers, a smiled took shape with a wave following behind it. She did the same in resonance.

To start off with, we didn’t say much to each other. We just kept smiling to each other. Our language was non-verbal, convergent in a way that only we understood it was on a high note; we were just delighted to see each other, at least which apply to me. It truly meant something to me, it was sweet. And I believe anyone who has been in my position would agree on this as well. The whole scene itself was a language to me that says, “See you soon, ok? Do take care.” We managed to have a group photo before we campers were ushered to the hall for briefing.
As I turned to say goodbye, just before I walk on and never look back, I saw her waving. The sight of her standing still, waving with a smile was just enough to melt me like a candle wax. There were no physical contact, no hand shake, no our usual high five. Just a wave and that was enough. The effort to be there was just significant already.

I think that you don’t need to say much to express what’s on the inside. Human communication does not only involve speech, which is verbal communication, but also emotion, which falls under non-verbal communication. All you need to do is to be psychologically in tuned to the same frequency. That way, any messages could be sent and would not be perceived wrongly. And with the same understood language as an enhancement to communication? You can be sure to avoid any form of communication break down.

When I came out, all my friends weren’t there anymore; she wasn’t there either. Well, she had a class to catch, all in all we’re all students. At anytime, studies overwrite what comes next. I understood that perfectly well. Besides, we’re just good friends at the moment. Anything extra is just the extended version of it.

It’s special to know that you have friends that appreciate you, and be there when you need them to be. And it’s even special when that someone special to you does the same thing. Human Communication is just a mystery. In this case, it’s pure special. What happened that day was just indescribable. The best I could come up with is just ‘Genuinely Special’.

DJ online,

-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

DJ on Language:~awkwardly sweet~

2009-05-26T08:29:00.007+08:00

Hollywood made it easy to express, the wedding cards gives you the impression that it is the easiest thing to say, contemporary songs made it colossally easy to song it out.

Have you ever tried expressing the most unpretentious phrase to a person you really like? However it may seem, it certainly proved to be the most abstruse expression I have ever attempted to project.

Some may ask, “Is this the first time you’re telling a girl? Chill brother! You? Being nervous? This isn’t you at all…” hmm… come to think of it, it’s quite true to say that it’s really my first time falling for some one for what she really is. Did I fall for her looks? It’s very fake of me to say no either. I believe that the majority settle for looks at the very first place before considering other factors, as people takes what is most obvious to them. However, you can never judge a book by its cover. You have to flip it, read it, and even understand it. As how Bacon would put it, “Some books are to be tasted others to be swallowed and a few to be chewed and digested.”
Saying that “I like you phrase” may be as ABC to some, but trust me, it’s more like XYZ to me, especially when you don’t have psychic to tell whether it will back fire or not. I’ll have all these “pre-telling” trauma like “Will she ignore me after telling her?”, “Is this an ill time to tell her?” Well folks, read on to see whether I had a happy ending!

Lunch on Thursdays is always extraordinary. For some reason, I always look forward to Thursdays. You know, back in high school, you will get a lousy schedule with your least favorite subjects in it that makes you go “God, it’s Thursday again!!!” But it all change in college, not to mention I only have 1 Human Communication class on that day. And lunch with her on every Thursday? It was the bonus that I wouldn’t as too much for!

Even as casual friends, I would bring lunch and we’ll share it. Please don’t get me wrong. We’re not eating from the same bowl, but divide it of course! Occasionally, she’ll do the rice, while I do the vegetables. What I’m trying to say is that we put the same amount of effort to our friendship, and that’s part of human communication as well.

To cut long story short, I planned to tell her that 3 word phrase on that particular Thursday. The question is how? Well, I had my plan A ready at the back of my hand. I actually planned to tell her on our way to a Korean Embassy event, after lunch. Well, at least I knew how the flow went.

We had a great chat that day during lunch. Then, we were supposed to catch a campus coach to attend the Korean Embassy event in Renaissance Hotel, but we missed the bus… Good Lord, now that the bus Is gone, I have no choice but to scrape plan A, which was to tell her on the bus!! What is more? I don’t have a plan B at all!!

So we headed to the computer lab to study for marketing quiz which was about to happen in a few days time. We have a campus online learning portal. So notes are available anytime. Well, guess what? She went on Facebook instead of studying, how hilarious is that? What a way to “study”, right?

At that point of time, I knew that opportunity is here. She isn’t pressured in any how; she’s online on Facebook, which means she’s free! So I had to find a perfect reason to lure her out of lab so that I could at least tell her in private. At least with that reason, our conversation wouldn’t sound too random, which of course would back fire if it’s done wrongly. Guess what was my perfect reason? My perfect reason was to buy her ice cream, which I had promise her that I would in the past. “Every strong chain has it’s weakest point; every ‘perfect’ reason has its perfect loophole.” And the perfect ice cream just turned into a blast-cream, because she wasn’t in the mood for it!

Well, by God’s grace another chance came. I wasn’t skeptical about chances, because it was all I ever had. So we were waiting for a friend in our campus corridor. We continued to chat as we were waiting. And the worst thing could ever happen just did happen! We were just topic- less.
I was lost for words! That’s the worst thing that you would ever expect from me. A part time Emcee and a hyperactive friend who could never keep his mouth shut just lost for words all of a sudden? I guess this is what they call psychology noise in human communication. To observe silence in the library is fine, but to observe silence after a conversation about “what kind of guys do you like” is not fine at all. Trust me, it was dead awkward.

I couldn’t remember how silent I was, but what I remember was the struggle to tell her, which I think she felt it too. To my surprise, just before I could open my mouth, she sprung up to me and told me that she knew what I was about to do all along. Well, she wasn’t awkward in a negative way when she said that to me. Instead, she was smiling, but awkward at the same time. At least I know that I’m not in for rejection. She then continued saying that she feels comfortable with the way things are, which was being friends at the moment, and might consider taking a step-up in the near future. I perfectly understood how she felt, and some things just cannot be pressured. What more? I can afford to wait for we are going to do the same course in our degree. I did explain to her that I didn’t mean to push her and hope that this wouldn’t affect our friendship. And she took it well. Till date, we agreed that we’re doing very well as friends and hope that things will not change for the worst. The least expected question from her was “you’ll wait for me, right?” What do you expect me to say? Yes, of course. I truly thank God that I wasn’t shot flat face down.

It only took 3 minutes of my entire life to express. Even though the wait would take up to more than God knows how many years, but that 3 minutes seems to be much longer compared to the wait. Time take? 3 minutes. Number of people involved? 2 people. Location? Our campus corridor. The language used? Awkwardly sweet.

At 5pm, just before she turned her back and leave for the exit that I normally walk her to, I looked at her and said with my awkwardly sweet tone, “I’ll wait for you!”

DJ online,

-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw

A - Demons

2009-05-24T18:10:00.010+08:00

Weekend laid in silently signifying the end of another hectic week. Since the starting of the week, everyone should be awaiting for these 2days holiday to come. Over the weekend, most people enjoy doing things at a leisurely pace. Somehow, there were people who will choose to spend their weekend by taking a good rest at home without going anywhere, or just hang out with friends, go for a tea break, chit chat around; or even go for a 2days vacation. Well everyone should be able to understand how relaxing it can be, because all of us had gone through it before. And all these activities not only can help us to spend our weekend meaningfully, it can also help us to improve relationship between the people around us.

On FRIDAY night, my cousin and I decided to go for a movie. It was the the latest movie which have been surrounded by hype for weeks and it have been leading the big box office numbers. The movie started at 11.55pm and ended at about 2.30am midnight that day. Although it was a late night movie but the cinema were surprisingly crowded with people. Well, throughout the show as what I had noticed everyone were awake for the 2 and 1/2 hours and were totally into the show.

"Angels & Demons" which is the prequel to movie "Da Vinci Code" was filmed based upon the bestselling novel by Dan Brown. Tom Hanks, Evan McGregor and Ayelet Zurer are the 3leading character that starred in ths movie. The storyline of A-Demons revolves around the Catholic and it was mainly about the few murder case that happened continuosly in the Catholic ruled city, Vatican City,Italy.

In this movie, Tom Hanks who was palying his role as Harvard religious expert Robert Langdon was invited by the priest to Vatican itself to investigate why four of their cardinals, who are in line to become the next pope, have disappeared and are in danger of being executed. He uses his thorough knowledge of Catholic history and putting his own best effort helping the priest to solve the cases. He was assisted by the scientist, Vittoria Vetra (Ayelet Zurer) throughout the case investigation.

I really enjoyed watching this movie and I find that it's worthful for me to sacrifice my sleeping hours and go for a movie that is such interesting, mysterious and adventurous as this. It is an entertaining and informative movie. Besides that, the movie do shows a bit cruelty in the way the few pope were torchured and murdered. On the other hand, male sidekick, Carmelango Patrick McKenna ( Ewan McGregor ) managed to leave a good impression in my mind although at the end of the movie, after the truth was revealed he was found out to be the protagonist in this movie. The scene of his that had impressed me in this movie is when he was told that the bomb were unable to be stopped, he immediately responded by grabbing the particles bomb, rush out of the St. Peter church, went on a helicopter, drove it to the sky alone, letting the bomb to explode in the air and finally managed to save himself by landing down with a parachute. Tears coming out from my eyes as I watched his act as a hero in this scene. Well I think if u had watched this movie probably you will have the same feeling as me too ^^

All in all, I think everyone should spend time watching this movie. Hopefully that you would enjoy watching it and able to learn something from it too like me.

cdv*p* - *pOLy* YEN YUN LiAn

If you can't, then you must

2009-05-24T17:09:00.006+08:00

It was sharp 5 in the evening. With the hope of being welcomed by friendly aquintances, I rooted myself on to a nearby bench. None was familiar in sight. Enduring the moment of silence and loneliness, I tried keeping my cool intact. 15 minutes has pass. Only to find myself exchanging glances with passerby's, I walked myself towards the bookstore in hoping for a more appropraite way to kill time. The books were neatly arranged according to thier types. Unattracted by the religion, leisure and novel category, I found myself heading towards the self-help section. Being the minority ones in the particular section, I helped myself into selecting any books that I find intriguing. I then picked up a book entitled, "Law of Attraction: The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don't". The long title seemed to have caught my attention. Curious with the content, I took my time to investigate the details within.

Including myself, there are friends of mine who failed over, and over again. Often, I wonder what's the difference that seperates us from someone successful. Apparently, the explanation to that was we are not taking the right actions. Success can be anything we want to achieve, from a long-lasting relationship to a professional carrier. While the more recognizable ones for a college student would be getting that good grades or impressing that secret crush.

We all have this fear of failing, the fear of rejection, fear of humuliation, and even more fears to live with. We generate this fears in order to save our faces. But see it through my point of view. If we do not start taking action now, there may not be a chance later on in life and we might live to regret it. We only live once, so what's there to lose? A question for all of us to rethink and reconsider; are you going to let these fears hold you back?

Making that first step can be tough. We might have to deal with failures along the way, but let it not discourage you as every failure is a step towards success. Give in your all and your success is just a matter of time. Without action, by default, you are letting life take control over you. Face your fears by taking action now and watch your life unfold the way it should.

Cute Carrot Chris~

Kute Karrot Khris~

(Prior to language week, visit this 2 link to 2 malay songs I which I thought was pretty amazing, both by Peter Pan)

http://www.imeem.com/yappoz/music/QA5XZCnL/peterpan-tak-bisakah/

http://www.imeem.com/honeydew/music/cPuhICwW/peter-pan-peter-pan-mungkin-nanti/

You're not sorry

2009-05-23T20:35:00.011+08:00

One used to tell me " Past is a History which you cannot change it anymore, Tomorrow is a Mystery which you cannot predict, Today is a gift and we called it as the Present, the only day that you can a plan and make a different in your life. " Time flies because today is the second last week of May, how many of us really live in the present? Enjoying himself without looking back to the past? It is hard to think about the present when you know that you did something hurtful to someone in the past.

I'm sorry, the sentence that commonly misused by everyone nowadays. Ok, it is right to say " I'm sorry " when you did something wrong but do you really mean it when you say "I'm sorry" to the other party? A lot of people use it without knowing the true meaning. It is just a habit for them to say "I'm sorry" no matter what happen without realizing that by saying this sentence means that you are really apologizing.

Being cruel to someone, say "I'm sorry"

Late for meeting, say "I'm sorry"

Unwilling to help people that need help, say "I'm sorry"

Saying "I'm sorry" has become an easy way for us to run away from punishments and troubles that we made by ourselves.

When we become aware of all the little things around, we make a conscious approach to every activity, we unable ourselves to mindful activity. Being mindful of everything, we will put an end to this shallow way of saying sorry.

For me, sorry means Sincerely Offers an apology Right from my heart when I Realized I did something that hurt You.

I guess sometimes we do not realize how many people we hurt per day but humans do make mistake. So to avoid saying "I'm sorry", we should not do anything that will lead us to feel regretful.

RAINBOW ",

2009-05-20T22:23:00.009+08:00

Sunshine showered the Earth, cracking the silence that has been remained through the night, first dew fall on the leaves, and it signifies a good starting of a day. I reluctantly crawl out from the bed and started to prepare myself for the day.
While I was on the way heading to college, I was staring at the sky and thinking bout something else. The RAINBOW that appears on the sky this morning managed to catch my attention ^^ It brightened my mood and inspires me.

Well, what will you think of if you see a rainbow? Good signs? Religious and cultural background? Or what else more? Well, it's actually very rare for us to see a rainbow. And perhaps you can hardly see one. Now lets try to flash through your memory and try to recall. When was the last time u seen a rainbow? Is it like few years ago or is it when you were a kid ... Or may be people like us who live in a city will never bothered to notice what are the things appearing outside the window. And probably most of us will always have the same excuse - We are too busy to be bothered my those sorts of things @@ Oopsy ... Did I speak out what you have in your mind right now "~

Rainbow is actually defined as an meteorological phenomenon. It will only appear in the sky when the Sun shines onto droplets of moisture. However, if you were to ask some christians about what rainbow means to them. They might tell you that rainbow best symbolises Christianity and it also have the same importance as "The Cross". For them RAINBOW is a sign of God's greatest promise to the human kind: that of forgiveness and love. This is the real significance behind the rainbow which you will never know ^^

However, "Meaning Lies in People, Not Words". For me, RAINBOW symbolises good sign. It makes me thinks that well it will be my lucky day today. And also hoping that many great things and great people will be there to lighten my day and bring happiness to me.

Moreover, I will have a good mood for the whole day if I see a rainbow. Even the weather also can easily affect my mood. It's just because I felt that I have a special connection with the nature and I simply enjoys the beauty of nature. I love to be with nature and I think that the GOD had done an awesome job of creating this universe. God created a chain between all living things on the earth and each of them have their own responsibility on maintaining the balance of ecosystem. And finally I came out with a POLY'S formula which is :-
Flora+Fauna+Me+You+They(Human Beings)=UNIVERSE !!!
Cool "? But do you agree with me ?! ", Haha. Anyway everyone could have their interpretation and perception on rainbow.

So the next time when you see a RAINBOW please think that you are lucky beacuse you have a chance to see it! And it signifies the good starting of your day and who knows it might bring luck to you throughout the day.

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

I Am Tall..

2009-05-19T23:38:00.009+08:00

Swine flu breakout. A very familiar phrase that has been widely circulated over the media for the past weeks. Without much concern, that was no surprise to me. Not feeling my best since the weekends, I was brought to believe that I may be a victim soon. Thoughts then came into my mind. I wasn't ready to depart. As much topics I have to blog in the future, I have even more to read. Then, I was to face something even more familiar to me. College. Academic excellence has constantly been a reminder of every parents to thier child. Being able to perform well in studies is the aim of every student and the dream of any parents. Some live up to meet that expectation while the others don't. For me, I remained. Like most teens, I had learn to adapt with the usual routine over time.

The day started off with the regular orientation. Enlightened with the humour during Human Communication class, I then proceed to my following lecture. Soon enough, I was already in my final class of the day. Statistics, as uninteresting as it sounds, I was still able to cast my eyes on the white screen until the class ended. While waiting at the bus-stop, I was blank and without emotion. Probably an expression that does not signal friendliness to people around me. Then I recalled an advice I had given to someone previously about turning out request and being able to say "no".

Often, I do find myself agreeing to do things for people in line to proper courtesy. However, there are times where refusing a certain demand can mutually benefit both parties. The other side may not be in favour of the rejection, but by saying no, it is the simplest solution available when things do not seem favourable to oneself. I believe that fighting for your own right and standing up for yourself is the more charitable deed. Besides, doing so will challenge the other to solve thier own problems. Emotional sympathy may affect our decision, but it is best if we are able to accept or reject in accordance with our rationality. We all know the word; however, building up the courage to say it can be tough.

While being a nice person doesn't always pay off, I would like to pay tribute by giving my utmost admiration and respesct for those that has done so. A thought came into mind about a song involving moutain & courage to sum everything up; however, my plan seem to go astray as I was unable to recall the title of the respective song. Thus, I had to revoke my purpose and end my post with something which is less compelling.

"Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.", Clare Booth Luce.

Crispy Creme Chris~

Krispy Kreme Khris~ =P

He says, She says

2009-05-18T17:55:00.017+08:00

Ok, I'll try my best not to talk about relationship between boyfriend or girlfriend since cute carrot Chris *oops, did i just indirectly mention how the cute carrot came from? haha* claims that my previous stories were about relationship.

Have you heard about " Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: Gender differences in Communication". How does language affect our interaction with other genders? Well, language is the basis of all interaction and integral part of our society; it uses a series of systems to convey meaning, thus setting up a discourse community. The surrounding environment plays a major role in our language as a social practice. Language is a form of communication involving an organized system of symbols whether written, spoken or pictures. Language is purposeful, built on shared conventions, shaped by the context and constitutes texts of various sorts and "…language is the source of human life and power". Language is used to achieve a variety of social purposes. For example, we use it to entertain, to explain how some thing works, to provide information. We also use language to make sense of the world, to express ideas on a range of topics and to interact with various audiences. People need to be able to communicate confidently and appropriately with people of all walks of life: with those who are older or younger and with those in positions of power.

Talking is a part of our physical needs. Even Wade, one of the characters in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, said that he never kept his mouth shut while he is awake. *my friend and i could not stop laughing with it in the cinema*. However, the way of communicate through language are different between men and women.

I'm sure everyone knows that men and women speak differently. The styles of men and women has been describe as " report vs rapport" or " competitive vs cooperative". For men, speaking is a way to negotiate their status in a group and preserve their independent. On the other hand, women speak to keep their friends close and intimacy, talk is a essence of intimacy, so being close friends mean sit down and talk. Personally, I did that quite a lot in high school. I even walked to the next classes and started to talk crap with my friends to kill time when teachers were not around, finished revision studies or after a long chat with my own classmates.

Have you ever take a step back and look around when men and women talk at the same time? Classic example, dining time with your parents. Your mother will probably keep on nagging about everything like what has she been through lately, housework, children and family stuff and father cannot figure out why his woman continually talk, talk and talking. Poor thing for men.

Women love to have "troubles talk" with everyone for the purpose of sharing their trouble in life with everyone because they think this is a way to keep others close to them, sharing is caring. During the troubles talk, men normally will just keep quiet and make women think that men are trying to cut them out of their life. As for men, they do not talk much about their troubles unless they really need advise because talking about their troubles is wallowing them. One common question from men, why women always complaint? Well, they never realized that women are just trying to let men be in their life, inviting them and share with them. What an interesting way for women to let men know that they needs support from men.

Both sexes need to understand their inherent differences of speaking so that they do not expect the impossible. Women should learn how to communicate with different genders and what kind of topics remain to specific gender only and men need to understand what women are talking about, women are not just talking to talk. Sometimes men should should their problems with women, through sharing is a way of showing women that men are not pushing them away.

Perhaps, if men stop expecting women to communicate like men and women stopped trying to make men communicate like women. Life will be so wonderful!

DJ on silence: Flowers and Kisses

2009-05-18T07:20:00.002+08:00

I love you mom, but Aucktoritates Aristatelis would have shot me down if he were alive with his quote that says “Parents love their children more than children love their parents.” Take a time out! Give me a break, will you? It’s mother’s day……

I hit the clock when it struck 6 in the morning. Half asleep and half awake, I clothed myself like a drunken dude. I’m going to hit the market today. My dad and brother just couldn’t let me have all the fun. The 3 of us gaily made our way to the market. Fresh clams, prawns, fish, vegetables, you name it! We’re doing something special for moms tonight.

Her morning started out on a casual note. There were no big hugs, no rich and fattening food to greet her on her bed. Dad, brother and I are all out, sister’s busy making a card in her room. Mom probably thinks that she’s still sleeping like a log like she always do. No one was to be seen. Well, there was no verbal communication that supposedly delighted morning. What a way to start mother’s day, poor mom…..

Well, if you say that there were no communications at all, I think you might want to rephrase your thinking. Indirectly, no matter how silent it is, we’re all performing non- verbal action that indicates otherwise. The trouble to wake up that early, the effort to make a card, the effort to make a trip down town to get a cake, is all acts of love. The message? “Mom, just wait.”

I think that sometimes, action does in a way replace speech in communication. For example, when a boy tries his best to talk to a girl, he’s trying to say “Hey, I'm interested in you. I want to know you more.” And hopefully that one fine day he could be more than friends with that particular girl. Or put it another way, when a motorist on the road shows you his fantastically short finger, he trying to say “You ‘smart’ boy! Pick your own lane!”. Does it make any sense to you now?

At 5pm, dinner preparation began. Sauces, vermicelli, seafood and all the ingredients were being meshed, mixed, boiled, and even grilled. All you can her is just sound of utensils hitting on each other, desperate chefs trying to meet each other’s deadline, and you can even smell aroma steaming out of the kitchen. Come to think of it, these elements are also part and parcel of communication. The message? “Mom, I’m preparing a special dinner for you. It’s from the bottom of my heart.”

During dinner time, mom couldn’t help but to express how happy she was. What did we do in return? Just smile…..and eat, of course. The message? “You’re welcome mom, it’s just a small dot compared to what you’ve been doing all these while.”

Just before I hit the hay sack and bid my grandma moon goodnight, I slipped into the master’s bedroom. With a Chopin’s piano playing at the background, I gave her a tight hug and a kiss on her face. 3 words is all I said the whole day (at least to her), that is “Night night mom!” With that, I left the room.

The message? There’s only one perception and frequency that everyone could agree on. And it is crystal clear, that is “I love you, mom!”

Live online,
-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw-

DJ on life: Ah Keong~

2009-05-17T22:25:00.012+08:00

"To err is to be human, to forgive is divine" If that were true, I think I just experienced humanity and divinity, both together at the same time.

If you think that just because you’re e paying RM12200 for each subject you enrolled, you’ll get knowledge? No doubt you will. Academically, it’s a big “Yes”. Life wise? I don’t think so. I think we could agree that there’ll come a time where academic knowledge is pointless in life, and that life lesson is more valuable. Reason? It’s simply because life lesson is obtained through many years of experience. It could be 30 years, 40 years…who knows?

Still skeptical? Put it this way, “By studying, I may loose to you, but to survive and being successful in this world? I guarantee you I’m no lower than you.” Think about this phrase and relate to what I said earlier. Does it make any sense to you? If life lesion were to be more valuable than academic lesson, I think I just got lucky. Why? It’s because I learnt this lesson off the class, through a hawker, someone who’s always being regarded as uneducated. But mind you, these people are just as educated as any of us is. Papers are just decorations on a visa when it comes to the real world. Veterans will strongly agree on this point. The thought of hawker are uneducated people is just purely human perception without any solid and concrete evidence.

It’s 16th of May, and I’m in charge of food and beverages in this college event, known as C2AGE. Well, I managed to convinced them to turn up for the event. Am competent in communicating? I have just proven myself. All things are well, at least for now…..

To cut long story short, this hawker was placed a bit far from the event venue. To be frank, I t wasn’t a fair game for him because there were more stalls inside the venue. Put it this way, the crowd was never near him at all.

Working non-stop for more than 24 hours, exhausted and tired, he was already loosing his temper with much flowered language, of course. What more? He has zero sales and it’s been 4 hours since he has been here. After trying 13 times to call me but greeted by failure because I was busy doing emcee, he just wanted to quit, pack up and hit the hay sack. But somehow, he stayed. Bare in mind that he’s already superbly pissed. Any passerby would probably sympathize and perceive that he’s being unreasonable. On the other hand, I really empathize his position and I think he has every rights to be reasonable. And for him to stay on with these conditions was just a miracle.

It’s 5, the event is about to end, still very little sales, not to mention profit. A call came, it was the pissed hawker. However reluctant to meet him, I went anyway. I didn’t wanted to meet him is because it just the same as walking in to a lion’s den.

It started off very coldly, not to mention that it was also raining. Knowing that more communication doesn’t always solve any problem ( at least in this case), I kept quiet. The wisest thing for me to do now is just listening. Trust me, it was way harder than I expected.

Expecting him to give me a big tight slap on the face and leave, he gave me a lecture instead. He started to tell me how things should be done, angrily of course. Well, put it this way, he’s giving me another chance, and all he’s asking is just to make enough money to patch up his petrol fee, a rather simple request. At this point, I knew that action speaks louder than words, and it’s a now or never situation.

Well, I gave him what he wanted, or should I say what he needed. I took the whole organizing committee out to his stall, and he was more than happy to see a stream of black t-shirts walking towards his stall. I saw the ticket, I took it, and I ran into the train.
On that “train”, I wondered why he didn’t pack up and leave when he had the chance. I had that mind blogging question in mind, and it was soon answered when he and I had a small chat while I was eating at this stall.

I guess I have a theory to propose, or rather a perception at this point of time, that is “All strangers can and always can communicate, as long as they have empathy towards each other.” He stayed because he knew that I was still young and I lost because of experience deficiency, and he knew that to blame me for his poor sale was just too poor of him. He stayed because he wanted to give me another chance, and that he looked at the bigger picture and he knew my position very well. On the other hand, I knew about his position and I simply acted upon it.

In the end, with each other’s phone number in each other’s phone, contented, we parted ways waving to each other. At that very second I knew that I could make an angry terrorist to my new good friend. I experienced the humanity side of him, that is anger and disappointment. What about the divine part of him? Well, he was just too God-like to skip the details and teach me new tricks for life.

That is what I call divinity!

LIve online,
-DJ Damian Thomas Khaw-

It's all about you

2009-05-17T03:17:00.003+08:00

Unexpecting anything other than the ordinary for the day, I was refreshed to uncover an acquisition of mine while in search of my misplaced academic documents. It was a book, that has been aging along with me since my schooling days. With a dust-covered surface, I took a quick attempt to scan through the contents. Fascinated, I had the book consume the rest of my evening. Night falls and a few phone texts broke my solitude. Unable to retain focus, I left the book as it was formerly.

With nought in mind, I visited the blog to inspect on new updates. Feeling unsurprised, Ms.Vanilla was once again second to none in her post. Seeing so, I was encouraged to follow up the post. An inspiration was also given by Poly; however, I had to reserve my slot as I was too far behind to chase silver.

Life will always have its ups and downs. From a box of chocolates to a bed of roses; those are the metaphors. The good times are even more fun when you are with people you enjoy. And the bad ones are easier to handle when you can turn to others for support and encouragement. *A dedication to my companions (:*

While making a difference for others is one of the most satisfying ways to feel like your time is worthwhile, positive intentions alone are not enough. As some might say "Its the thought that counts", I personally would like to contradict and disagree with such description. To me, it is your action that really counts! Communication is essential, but being able to walk the talk serves a higher priority.

Cute Carrot Chris~
Kute Karrot Khris~

A Lesson to be Learned

2009-05-16T23:44:00.004+08:00

Story begins here ....
THURSDAY, 14/05/2009
As usual after class ended, I went through my daily routine again in order to get back home. The crowd in the train was as usual and I didn't manage to get a seat. The train's door closed and i ended up standing just beside the door. It was sudden silent in the train and nothing looks different that day. The train passed by few stations, door opens, people enter and leave the train.
When the announcement system sounded "Stesen berikutnya, Pasar Seni", just happened that I was looking at the train's door. Crowd rushes in and i spotted a familiar face among the crowd. I thinked hardly trying to recall who is he. Second passes by, images flashing through my mind and I finally manage to remember who is he. There and then my anger and emotions rushes out! Now i realize how Empathy and Sympathy can affect out judgement.

>Now let me explain here. The "familiar guy" he is actually a man that i met before at "the" LRT station near KLCC. Few weeks ago during our sem break, I went out with my friend. That evening we ended our shopping day and were heading back. Me and my friend were talking while we were walking. Suddenly a man approached us.
He is around the age of 40, tall, thin, bald (wearing a cap), casually dressed, carrying a bag pack and was holding a map. He started the conversation in chinese and asked us for help. He told us that he is a Singaporean and came to KL to attend a motivation camp. Unfortunately, someone has stollen his wallet and his passport. Now, he got nothing left excpet few Singpr. Syiling. He told us that he need to get to KL Central to meet his brother who will be coming from Singapore over here to help him.
After hearing him saying what he had gone through, we felt pity for him and sympathy falls in. So we decided to buy him a ticket. After that we handed over the ticket and he followed us down to the LRT plattform. Now he started to complain that he is too thirsty and can we give him some money to buy a bottle of water to drink? Well at that moment I was wondering that this guy is starting to demand a lot and wanted to get more money from us. But finally we also gave him a sufficient amount of money to buy a drink. He sincerely said thanks for our help and rushes in the LRT.
That night itself, I told my parents about what had happened. Surprisingly instead of nagging at me they laughed at me badly. They told me that we were cheated and many similar cases had actually taken place there. But I tried to explain to them that guy's expression looks really real and pity. Well if we were cheated by him, we only lost our sympathy and a small amount of money, which is only $1.80 from each of us. But if he is a tourist who desperately needs help, then at least we had done our best to help him out and hoping that he had a good impression of Malaysia.

Sunday, 17/05/2009
Well, meeting him at the LRT that day really did give me a big shock. I felt like walking to him and ask him "Shouldn't you be in Singapore now? Instead of appearing here with the same outfit and pity look?!" However, I didn't do so because I was afraid that he will beat me there and then in the train == But I think that day he did recognise me thats why he don't even dare to look up and look at me while we were in the train.
Now, I am here to share my experience hoping that it teaches everyone a lesson-Not to trust anyone easily. And no matter what situation you are in, please do differentiate sympathy and empathy. Kindly remember that don't let ur emotions take control of your mind or else it will lead to wrong decision making and ended up like me @@
POOR POlY :(

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

Blind

2009-05-16T16:38:00.011+08:00

Last week, my friends and I had a random talk about people's attitude nowadays when they are in a relationship especially how possessive can some be in a relationship. What do I mean about possessive? It means demanding total attention of love or not wanting the other one be independent.

It is true to say that different people have different perception like the way we notice things especially we notice things with our senses. So what do I consider as being possessive?

Does your boyfriend/girlfriend distrust you?

Do you often reject invitations from friends just because you are 'afraid' your boyfriend/girlfriend will get angry?

Does your boyfriend/girlfriend specifies a certain curfew for you? (and makes sure you comply)?

Does your boyfriend/girlfriend often accuse you of being unfaithful when he sees you hanging out with the opposite sex?

If you answer yes for more than 3 times for these questions, I assume that you might be having a possessive partner. So is it good to have a possessive partner? There is no straight answer to this question, as it is a very subjective question and it all depends on the other party. I have seen some that are happy in a possessive relationship because they feel that by being possessive, they know that the other party cares, loves, and can't stand to lose them at all cost. Take an example that I have, a couple, Aaron and Julia. They started to date each other since 2006 and a lot of drama happened in between until they decided to take a year break with each other. Then they re-date each other at the end of 2007. With this, Aaron becomes a possessive boyfriend that in everyone's mind because he does not let Julia goes out and have fun with her friends. Possessiveness can surely bring an end to a relationship. It can turn a good relationship to a sour one with arguments, jealousy and so on. Fortunately, Julia is willing to be his under control and eventually their relationship still can stay strong until now.

Ok, back to the topic, perception. What do you think or any idea in your mind about this couple after hearing this story? As for my friends, they think that Aaron is being crazy, over jealously, even worst, a control freak. There is not wrong that eveyone thinks Aaron is over react to Julia but have everyone wonder what is the one makes Aaron act in this way or everyone just judge him through his action? Of course, there are reasons to explain his action like maybe is due to his past experience? What meaning have similar events held? He has been through with the a-year-break-for-each-other and of course he does not want thing happens in that way again. However, with our perception, some do not think that way. Don't you think is unfair for him if we just jump to the conclusion with our own perception? It is undeniable that we are easily influenced by what is most obvious especially what we see with our eyes. As for me, I think we should take time to know that person instead of cling to the first impression, even if is wrong. Take it in the other way round, what if people have a wrong concept about you? How would you feel? You are trying your best to make a change what you are in their heart but they still stick with the first impression? I am sure this sounds unfair for you. Same things goes to others, we should take time to know them instead of having perceptual errors on others that can lead to troublesome communication in the future.

So from now on, we should give everyone a change to know them without strongly holding our perception.

POLY Speaking

2009-05-12T23:17:00.005+08:00

"Communication is Not Simple" I agree unequivocally with this sayings. Well if you were to ask me how I found human communication is? This will be my answer to you. Perhaps this will be the most perfect phrase n conclusion that comes into my mind after attending few classes for this subject.

I can clearly remember that in our first class for human com, the first question that Mr.Murali (our human com lecturer) ask us was "What you think Human Com is?" and "What you expect to learn from this subject?". Well, frankly speaking, I really have no idea what human com is about at the beginning. But from the name of this subject, I can tell that it must be something to do with communication between human being. However, I don't think this is a convincing answer ==

"Communication refers to the process of human beings responding to the symbolic behavior of other persons. It is a continuous and ongoing process." I think this will be the best interpretation for the phrase, communication. Just simply because I got this from the text book. Wakaka ^^

Well as this is just the beginning of the semester, there are many friends that come by and ask me what are my electives. And when i said that human com is one of my electives, the first respond they will give me is always the same, which is "How come ar?!" Perhaps everyone will have the perception that communication need not to be trained and courses regarding this is unnecessary. Moreover, they will think that a good communicators can be born naturally with the intelligence and it is easy to achieve the goal as a good communicators. Well, I would calssify this perceptions as "Misconception of Communication".

However after being exposed to this subject, I learnt that communication among people are fundamental. We need to know the right way to communicate and to deliver our message to others in order to avoid misunderstanding and conflicts in communication. And kindly believe me, there are much more knowledge to be learnt beneath communication. You would never know that this subject can be such interesting and such useful to be applied in our daily life, unless you have gone through this 3 and 1/2 month course, costing $1400, which is really valuable and worthful.

Hmm, well thats all I have for my very first post in this blog. Hopefully it is informative enough and had provide everyone with some knowledge about what human communication actually is. I will be back soon by this week again for my second post. Take care and good luck to everyone ^^

P/s: To all of my friends that have misconception of communication, I would like to say that "Lets make a deal! I can promise you that by the end of this semester, I will give you a FOC private lecture session and I will definitely change your point of view about communication!" By that time, kindly address me as Miss Poly. Your private human communication home tutor. Haha ^^

cdv*p* - *pOLy* LiAn

A new begining...

2009-05-12T01:52:00.003+08:00

My very first post on this blog!Cheers to our lecturer Mr.Murali and to my fellow group members*as shown in the pic*

Before I begin I would like to take the time to put forth that any post made is to further enchance the learning process and is uninteded to offend anyone in any way, now or in future.

Thinking to myself regarding what could be interesting enough to be put up as a first post, I embark on journey of mind that brings me to the past and present. As I see myself in previous experiences and actions, I sense a slight feeling of dissapointment there. Yes, there are things which I shouldn't said or wish I had the chance to say. Yes, there are things which I shouln't or should have done. Being reminded by myself as this being the problem people have in common, I felt a brief moment of relief as this makes me indifferent and as human as others; or at least I would like to believe so. Then, I recalled a phrase or perhaps a caution that a friend has told me not too long ago. It goes something like "You cannot take back words that you have said. Even if u decided to do so, damaging words will remain inside a person as a scar which will be long lasting if not forever". The lines weren't the identical one that was expressed as my memory only retains a partial part of the speech. I know the exact meaning that lies behind those lines even when I heard it for the first time. It is a warning to be careful with my words as they may lead to regrettable outcomes. The voice is still clear in my head as I sat down and think about it once again. There are things which can't be undone. Knowing that, those are the things that sleep deep within me and its awakening every once in a while still continues to haunt me.

Have the hunter actually became the hunted? :O

Being snapped back to reality, I remembered what our topic of discussion was this morning in Human Communication class. Perception was the topic and it revolves around underlying assumptions made by people. As much interest I have over this topic, I tried very hard to maintain attention over the period of an hour and a half due to a headache.
Being assigned randomly into groups by our lecturer, it is fate that has brought about the four of us together. Still unfamiliar with the chosen individuals, I look foreward into enjoying the company of my new companions. Besides, the way I perceive them will certainly not fail my judgement. We have... *drums roll*

Damian the friendly and perhaps understanding one. Also the loudest amongst all. Good leader & team player :)

Polly the happy one that takes the bus!*See ya at the bus-stop sometimes*. Also with a wicked sense of colouring :3

Vivian the pretty one who likes latte. Also I'm sure there will be more then just what meets the eye ;)

So it is true the best things in life are free!(Hey wait, I think i paid RM 1,200 for this class)
Checking my watch, the short hand points at 1 while the longer one showing 10. I guess its not my nature to leave things half way. I suppose my post ends here.

Cute Carrot Chris~

Kute Karrot Khris~

The closest can share, with communication

2009-05-11T16:50:00.025+08:00

People start looking for a relationship from the age of 17 . In order to make a commitment for a relationship, it takes trust between two people. It obviously shows that we need basic interaction that called as Dyadic Communication.

Dyadic communication plays an important role in a relationship. It is the key for each other to open the door in our heart. Without it, the door in our heart will be reminded close and one hardly get the chance to open the door no matter how many times he tries. It is much more easier just talk, listen and be understanding to the one you like. It is not easy to be done through communication because it can cause problems like misunderstanding as well. However, things can be solved if we listen to them sincerely and eventually the door will open with love to welcome us. A bad communication will only lead us to a bad memories between each other and being regretful for the rest of our life.

Communication only can work well when both respect each other. For example, if one thinks that she is being attacked by the word coming out from the other and is hurting her, she will automatically close the door in her heart. It is important for us to have a good communication so that other will open the door and gain the trust between each other.

Sometimes we are afraid of the past will threaten the current relationship like the girlfriend meets her ex-boyfriend, it is normal to feel that way. We all have our past, it happened in the past. This is the time where two people need to communicate and make each other understand the situation. Keep on talking the past relationship will only cause trouble for the current relationship, we should leave it behind. With the honest talk , couple will trust each other and make the relationship work even better.

Lastly, a good strong relationship needs a good communication. The door in everyone's heart will open if we communicate well with them.

Testing post

2009-05-10T21:27:00.003+08:00

My 2nd visit on the blog, just stop by to say gud job all :)..
<3 the colours and the headers!

Cya guys in coll ;)

-long live banana-cutecarrot blogspot...etc...~~~~

The Human Communication

2009-05-07T14:46:00.004+08:00

This blog is designed to introduce public to Human Communication at college level.
We come in peace, i think...
Communication is action.
With action comes response.
Response initiate emotion.
Emotion to relation.
Relation depends on perception.......

Peace ^^v
-DJ Damian